Candles in Gloom
by Huhn
Summary: A Nadesico Christmas story! Can Hari and Ruri save Christmas for a suicidal Nergal employee?
1. Prologue

**Candles in Gloom**

**Disclaimer – Nadesico is owned by Xebec and ADV films, not me. Hell, if I owned it, there would be a second series by now, involving Ruri combing every corner of the universe trying to find her father, plus a romantic side-story with Jun and Megumi. Never mind. **

**Welcome! **

**This here's my second Nadesico fanfic. It's based an idea I had in the summer which wouldn't leave me alone – a Christmas story involving 'series Ruri' and 'movie Hari'. It's an AU fic, since they are both twelve years old in it, but I haven't changed much else. The seven chapters of this fic will be put up during the course of advent and the final chapter will be put up on Christmas Eve. **

**Oh, and readers of 'Where I Belong' may recognise a familiar face. And no, it's not Matador. **

**Please enjoy. **

**Prologue**__

_Midday__, __23rd December 2198___

            In most times and places, people can only dream of having a white Christmas. But that was not the case now and here. Fortune and meteorology had blessed this little village with a whole December of snowfall. The white stuff lay all around in deep, crispy layers which sparkled blindingly in the strong winter sun. It was draped on the branches of the bare trees, paved on the roads and blanketed all over houses, turning the whole village into a storybook image of winter. And through this sublime picture, three girls and a man walked, towing a sleek blue sledge behind them. The snow crunched satisfyingly under the tread of their booted feet as they made their way to the station.   

            "My God," Mikoto chirped, wrapping her arms around herself and shivering dramatically. "Bloody freezing, ain't it?"

            Yukina nodded assent with her own shiver, while Akito just chuckled lightly. Ruri, however, remained as silent as she had been for the last half-hour without even giving her a glance. She just continued to walk along, chewing her white lips fretfully and fidgeting with her gloved hands. Akito knew this agitation was very unusual for her, the little girl who was an expert in keeping calm and composed. She'd been this way ever since this morning and it had become more and more evident throughout the day. Akito wasn't worried though, for he knew she was just nervous. Yes, hell had frozen over and stoic Miss Hoshino was nervous.

The young chef smiled to himself, knowing that the Ruri of old would never have been so restless. But then again, she'd changed a lot since those days. Family life had broken down her emotional barriers, allowing her feelings to break through the ice for everyone to see. In a way, Akito loved to see her like this. This emotional display was a testament to what a wonderful job he and Yurika had done with the girl. Thanks to their love, she was now more human than ever before and had the power to reveal these uncontrollable feelings she had on the surface.  

            What made it all the more amusing was that this fluster was all because of a boy. 

            Yes, today was the day that Hari was arriving. Hari who was Ruri's closest friend, and her oldest one too, for her had also been involved in that experiment to produce child prodigies. Ruri had been the most successful of the batch, but Hari had been close behind, so Nergal had made the choice to pluck him from obscurity to train him up shortly before the war had begun. The pair had been reunited briefly before she'd been recruited to the Nadesico, then once again when she'd returned, during the official UEAF debriefing after the war. It was then that they'd realised that they shared the same past and this common thread had been the grounding for their relationship. Over the course of the summer and winter, they'd seen each other many times (for he was only in Hiratsuka, a handful of stops away on the train) and she'd even invited him along as her guest to the Nadesico crew reunion ball last August. Somehow, inexplicably, they had forged a very tight friendship in the short time they had known each other. Whether it was based on their numerous similarities or equally numerous differences was unclear, but one thing was certain. Ruri had finally found a friend her own age who she could relate to and he was thrilled for her.   

            By now they were at the train-station. A village of this size only merited two platforms, one each side of the tracks. Impressively, both of them had been freshly swept clear of snow. Only a few other people currently stood there, most likely also waiting for guests to arrive via rail. They were a little early, so Akito went and bought coffee for them to help stave off the cold as they began their wait. They had only been standing around for four minutes past the ETA before Ruri's impatience boiled over into worried voice. 

"Is it possible there's been a problem with the track?" she asked, clearly concerned. 

            "Don't worry so much Ruri!" Akito answered with a laugh. "He'll be here eventually. The train's just a little late that's all." 

            "Yeah, I guess the weather slowed it down," Yukina added, in a tone that betrayed she'd spoken merely to sound as if she was smarter than Ruri, rather than to comfort her. 

            "You're right. I apologise for being so irrational," Ruri said, dipping her head. "I suppose I'm just nervous." 

            "I still don't get why you're stressed out and all," Mikoto said, stretching her arms out behind her with a lazy yawn. "You're never like this normally."

            Ruri looked over to her. "Well, I haven't seen him in a long time," she replied lamely. 

            It wasn't enough to satisfy Mikoto. "So just what is he to you? _A boy-friend?_" the girl with purple hair continued. She made it sound like some gruesome tropical disease. 

            Ruri blinked twice in quick succession. "If you mean he is a friend who is a boy, then I suppose he is, yes."

            "No, I meant…oh forget it!" Mikoto sighed. "Sheesh, you're impossible, you know that?"

            "Sorry," Ruri murmured. It was clear that she wasn't sure what for.       

            It was then that they heard the sound of an approaching train. Sure enough, it had finally arrived. As it screeched into the station, Akito saw Hari's face flash by them from one of the carriages. Ruri had seen it too and, to his disbelief, was actually running alongside the train in an effort to keep up with it, her dancing bunches sharing her urgency. Akito went to follow her, but realised he wouldn't be able to run without spilling hot coffee over himself and so came at a more leisurely pace. The other two followed him, making disdainful tutting noises.

            The train finally came to a halt. Ruri was way ahead of them and eagerly standing at the correct door, like a dog waiting to be taken for a walk. A second later, it opened and she was engulfed by a stream of people flowing out. She pushed through them to hold her ground, persisting even when a miserable old woman shoved her out of the way with enough force to knock her down. She was back up on her feet before Akito had chance to worry about her and stood ready to claim her reward, who was now stepping off the train, comically dragging a massive suitcase behind him. Hari Makibi had arrived.  

            For a moment they just stood apart, smiling at each other. Then they both said 'hi' at the same time and laughed awkwardly at that. Then Hari dropped his case so that they could hug each other. There was something tentative in the motion, perhaps natural given the time they'd been apart and nothing that a little 'how-are-you?' conversation wouldn't cure. It was a bit of an anti-climax after all the build-up, Akito felt, but hey, he was here now. And while he was, his cute little daughter would be happy. 

            Yep, it was shaping up to be a very fine Christmas indeed. 

**A/N – I know that was short, but Chapter 1, coming around this Friday, will be longer and will get the story started for real. All comments are appreciated, no matter what your opinion is. And feel free to flame. If I get enough I can roast chestnuts on an open fire. ^-^**


	2. Snow Problem!

**A/N – Thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far, I wasn't expecting to get any from just the prologue! Still, your comments really encourage me so I'll do my very best to give you a decent story in return. **

**Before Chapter 1 begins, I need to say up a couple things which I really should have said before. Firstly, this story takes place during the Blank and hence contains spoilers for the Nadesico series (though not the movie of course). Secondly, for those who don't know her, Mikoto was a character in my other Nadesico fanfic (she's not just some random person who I've bunged in!). Picture her as a preteen version of Megumi with a drama-queen personality and you won't be far off.**

**Here comes chapter 1. I sincerely apologise for its title but I couldn't resist.**

**Chapter 1 – Snow Problem!**

_Late morning, __24th December 2198___

It's a common misconception among parents that it is possible to bung a group of children together and they will all play nicely with one another, regardless of their compatibility or personalities. That was the case in the Tenkawa household now, where the four children staying had been neatly divided into the 'loud pair' and the 'quiet pair'. Strangely enough though, the quiet pair had been the adventurous ones today, braving the Antarctic weather conditions to build a snowman, while Yukina and Mikoto stayed in and played _Destiny Warriors on Ruri's computer. _

            Both children had worked well together and their basic construction of their snowman was sturdy and solidly packed together – it would take more than the winter wind to demolish this guy. They had made some spindly arms from sticks and used stones for eyes, mouth and buttons, plus a traditional carrot for the nose. Hari had even donated his scarf to the cause. A frozen neck was a small price to pay for the 'finished' look it gave to their creation. That was the final touch and now they stood back together to admire their efforts of the last hour. They spent a small silence of still satisfaction which was broken by Hari when he spoke. 

"Wow," exclaimed the dark-haired boy. "I think we've done a great job here! Looks pretty good, don't you think Ruri?" 

            "I guess so," she replied half-heartedly.  

            Hari noticed her lack of enthusiasm. "What's wrong?" he asked her. 

            Ruri looked at the snowman again, pursing her lips. "I can't help feeling it was a waste of effort. We built him well, but it doesn't matter in the end. He'll have melted when spring comes and nothing will be left of our achievement. So why did we bother?" 

            Oh, Ruri's gloomy lapses. The one flaw she had, in Hari's eyes. "You can't think of it like that!" he protested. "Sure, he'll be gone in a few weeks, but we had fun building him, didn't we? And we can still appreciate him while he's here, right?"

            "Yes. You're right," she turned to him with a faint smile. "I'm sorry, Hari. I shouldn't be so despondent."

            "Anyway, we _can have something to remember it by!" he added, whipping out his minute digital camera from his inside pocket. "How about you stand next to him so I can get a picture?"_

            Ruri immediately blushed and lowered her head. "Let me take the picture," she murmured bashfully. "I'm not very photogenic."

            "What are you talking about?! You look great!" Hari blurted before he could stop himself. Ruri's blush deepened further and she turned away from him to hide it. 

            The young boy sighed. "Let me take the picture and if you don't like it, we'll delete it. How does that sound?"

            Seeing that Hari wasn't about to be dissuaded, Ruri gave in. "All right," she said, biting her lip pensively. She moved over to their happy snowman and gave the camera a weak smile. The light blush still remained on her cheeks.  

            _Whirr._

            "There, I got it. That wasn't so bad, was it?"

            "Let me see it," she demanded, holding out a hand. 

            He handed it to her. "See? You look wonderful Ruri. It would look great on your desktop!"  

            "It's….acceptable," Ruri conceded with a nod. "But let me take one of you now."

            They swapped roles and took another fantastic photo. Then they spent another moment regarding their handiwork before Hari spoke again. "So now what shall we do?"

            Ruri shivered involuntarily. "It's getting cold and my gloves and boots are quite wet. Can we go back indoors?"

            "Sure. I guess lunch will be ready by now anyway,"

            "You're right. Come on, let's go." Together they started to head for home. 

            As they walked side by side back towards the house, Hari found his eyes travelling over to his pale companion of their own accord. With a little grin, he studied her. She looked very fetching indeed in her lavender coat with matching mittens. Though it was bitterly cold, her colour and poise were constant, leaving her beauty untouched by the ravages of the final season. She was white on white, her free hair even shinier than the snow all around them, and full of life in the chilly winter breeze that nipped their faces.  

            _"She's so beautiful. Winter's really her season." _

            Noticing his gaze, she gave him a smile, making him feel even happier. She didn't smile a lot, so every one he received seemed ever so special. No-one could deny that she was the cutest little girl when she was happy, and Hari certainly wasn't about to. For at twelve he was of an age where girls had become more than carriers of cooties. Ruri was the prettiest girl he knew, but it wasn't just her looks that attracted him. It was more the way their personalities connected like two pieces of a jigsaw. She saw and liked those attributes in him that were good, and accepted those which weren't. And he did the same to her. They were a perfect pair who brought out the best in each other. 

            _"It would be so great to have a girlfriend like her."_

            He quickly shook those perverse thoughts from his head. Though he'd long since admitted that he had strong feelings for Ruri, he knew that he would never dare act on them. Ruri was the best friend he had, his soul-mate in truth. But he didn't want to jeopardise the wonderful friendship they already had. It was enough for Hari, even if he was frustrated, he was happy as it was. Of course that didn't mean he couldn't be happier…   

            The mention of his name woke him from his thoughts. 

            "Hari?" she said. God he loved the way she spoke his name.

"Yeah Ruri?"

She tilted her head and looked at him pensively. "I have a question. It may seem a bit odd."

"Sure, okay. Fire away."

"What does Christmas mean for you?"

Hari was baffled by the strange question and answered too hastily. "What Christmas means to me? Erm…I don't know. I guess its all about Santa, presents and stuff. And celebrating the Christmas story, you know the birth of Jesus and all that. Then there's gifts under the tree, Carol singing, mince pies…..yeah." He racked his brain for more to add. His response seemed a little, well, shallow. But what answer had she been expecting?

            Whatever it was, it wasn't what he'd given her. She just gave a little unconvinced nod and looked away again. Hari tried to meet her eyes to return the question, but was interrupted by a different voice before he could.   

"Heads up!"

Hari turned just in time to see a snowball headed their way. Instinctively he swayed to one side, dodging the missile, which proceeded to smash head-on into Ruri's face. It was a direct hit and she toppled like a pin to land on her back in the snow.

            "Ruri!" Hari darted to her side. "Are you okay?"

            "I'm fine," Ruri spluttered, instantly sitting bolt upright and wiping her face with her hands. Hari resisted the urge to laugh at her, so comically shaken from composure in a second. As he couched down to help her, he heard running feet crunching through the snow towards them. He looked up to see Akito Tenkawa, Ruri's adopted father, approaching them with concern in his face. 

            "Sorry Ruri! I didn't hurt you did I?" 

            Ruri cleared the last of the snow from her eyes and glared angrily at her father. "Idiot!" 

            "That was very unfair, Mr Tenkawa," Hari said, taking her hand and helping her up. "Catching her unawares like that." 

            Akito laughed cheerfully. "Hey, you can't complain Hari. I was actually aiming for you, you know!"

            "Oh great, that's okay then," Hari murmured sarcastically. "But hitting a lady like that is just plain dirty." 

            "Yeah, okay, I'm sorry. But seriously are you okay Ruri? Didn't mean to get you in the face like that."

            She shook her head dismissively. "I'm fine. It just startled me, is all."      

            "Good. Anything I can do to say sorry?"

            "Heh, I can think of something," murmured Hari, already crouching down. In a lightning movement, he scooped up a handful of snow and hurled it at Akito. 

            "You can eat snow!"

From point-blank range he couldn't miss and Akito recoiled in surprise as it stuck him. This gave Hari a chance to follow-up the attack and he'd chucked three decent snowballs before Akito had even begun to retaliate. Akito pelted him with efficient well-packed projectiles, but fortunately for Hari, reinforcements came in. To his delight, Ruri joined in the fight, exacting revenge on her father by taking Hari's side. It was a messy battle in such close quarters, but very one-sided being two on one. Akito was barely holding his own and was then left defenceless when he tripped backwards over a root to fall down on his back. The motion caused the branches above him to shudder and shower him with fine snow. Seeing he was vulnerable, the children eagerly raced in for the kill. 

            "I surrender! Have mercy!" he gasped, now a totally white figure with his arms raised in surrender. The pair exchanged a glance, then settled for throwing the final snowballs still in their hands before helping him up. He spluttered and laughed as they helped brush the worst of the snow off him. 

            "Sheesh, you two didn't hold anything back!" 

"Served you right," Ruri murmured. "An unprovoked attack from out of the blue like that is entirely deplorable in my opinion. More like something Mr Akatsuki would do."  

            "Oh dry up!" Akito chuckled again and put a loving arm around his smiling daughter. "Come on, let's go back in and warm up. I'll get a fire going, how does that sound?"

            "Pretty good, Mr Tenkawa!" Hari said, falling in beside them. Three smiling faces headed back towards the house, hearts happy with the prospects of the coming few days. 

Hari resisted the urge to wring his hands in excitement as they went. 

            _"It's going to be a wonderful Christmas! I just can't wait!"_

*          *          *

            While all was jolly in the Tenkawa household, things were very much different in a little apartment in central Hiratsuka, just a short distance away. While 'ri duo had been playing in the snow, Erina had been sitting in a chair and crying her black heart out. 

            This was it. It was over, finished. She just couldn't face another Christmas alone. 

This most emotional time of year had always been difficult for her. For the past few Christmas's she had distracted herself with work which had made them so much easier to bear. She vividly recalled last year, when she'd been so snowed under with her bosun-jump research that she hadn't had the chance to think about the festive season. But this year was different – Akatsuki had told her to take some time off. _'You've been working far too hard Erina dear! Take this Christmas off! Go home and let your hair down, see your family and have some fun for a change!'_

            Yeah. As if she could do that. Her family had long since disowned her. Ever since she'd reached this position in Nergal she'd given them the cold shoulder. By then they were more of a hindrance than a help to her career, and she'd decided that she didn't need them anymore. It had been over three years since she'd last spoken to them, and that had been a heated argument which had resulted in her storming out of the house flinging horrible expletives behind her as she went.              

            Now more than ever she felt the loneliness she had inflicted on herself. In her everyday life, the pursuit of her selfish ambitions kept her content, though not truly happy. But now, with all the diversions put to one side she could see her life for what it really was. Sure she was pulling in a nine figure salary, and sure, she was as high in Nergal as she could get without Akatsuki making way for her. But what did it all matter when no-one else cared, for either her or her life? Every night she came home to a lonely apartment. She never received calls or e-mails from anyone without a Nergal-related purpose and never received any mail that wasn't bills or bank statements. Outside of work, she didn't exist. She was a machine, switched off and dormant when not in use.  

            All she wanted now was a dear one to take hold of her and tell her that she was loved. But that was the one thing her money couldn't buy. 

            It was too much to bear to see everyone else revel in the very joy she so longed far. With the arrival of Christmas, the numbing depression that had haunted her autumn had come to a head, growing to the point where she just couldn't cope with it anymore. The agony of loneliness was too great now. She was prepared to forsake all feeling, if that was the price to pay for ending this pain. 

She was not a woman given to impulsive decisions and had decided that one final day on Earth was needed for reflection, and to give her life one last chance to make amends. For the whole day she would sit here at her desk, watching her clock count down the final hours of her life. Her sharpened knife rested menacingly on her desk, like a snake eying its prey before pouncing. Twelve midnight was zero hour. On the very stroke of Christmas, she would run the blade through the veins on her wrist, ending it all in one final tragic performance. Let the soulless Erina Won go out with the emotion she'd lacked in the world's eyes.

            The clock struck twelve. Her final midday had arrived. Erina ran the blade along her arm, not quite breaking skin, then set it down on the table in front of her. That had been a test run. Twelve hours to go before her knife tasted flesh proper…


	3. The Teardrop Squeals

**Chapter 2 – The Teardrop Squeals                       **

_Lunchtime, 24th December 2198_

The turkey was in the freezer, the gifts were under the tree and the wreath was on the door. All the pieces were falling into place and the long-awaited Tenkawa Christmas party was a go. (Incidentally they'd gone for just Tenkawa after realising that the only fair alternative was 'the Tenkawa/Misumaru/Hoshino Christmas party' – far too much of a mouthful.)

            The guest list was stocked with some golden company. Of course, Minato and Yukina had been the first to be invited, being close family friends. Mikoto, Ruri's friend from her orphanage days, had also been granted special permission to spend Christmas with them, and was very grateful for the opportunity. Ryoko Subaru would be coming up on the day, having nowhere else to go after both her parents decided they'd be working the Christmas shift. Finally, the newly engaged couple of Jun Aoi and Megumi Reinard were driving up and were set to arrive this evening. So many guests had created a real accommodation nightmare until Akito had come up with the idea of bunging all the kids in sleeping bags on the floor of the restaurant. Then Minato would commandeer Ruri's room, and the betrothed couple would stay on the sofa-bed in the living room. A brilliant solution really. Except for the kids of course.

Everyone was excited, with much cause. Not only was it the first Christmas of the new era of peace between Earth and Jupiter, but it was the first 'family' Christmas for all four children, plus it was Yukina's first one period. All this made this twenty-fifth of December an extra special day and one that deserved all the celebration they were preparing for it. Yes, this Christmas would be magnificent, a real Christmas among Christmases and was destined to become a day forever etched in their fond memories.  

            That was tomorrow though. Today was just the warm-up. Christmas Eve is the most unbearably exciting afternoon of the year, but a fun morning in the snow, followed by copious bacon sarnies can make the wait a little bit easier to deal with.

*          *            *

            "Oh, you're back!" Yurika said brightly from the kitchen. "Just in time as well! Who wants bacon-butties?"  

            "Me!" Hari, Ruri and Akito announced as one, as they shed their sopping wet outdoor layers into a damp pile on the hallway floor. Warm food sounded very tempting after their capers in the snow and not even Yurika, with her limited culinary skills, could mess up a bacon sandwiches. 

            Hari shook off his last sleeve, then hung his coat up before following Akito and Ruri into the kitchen. Welcome warmth touched his face as soon as he stepped in and his frozen cheeks stung pleasantly as they began the thawing process. He saw Ruri's mother attending the grill with her back to them and the lovely smell of the cooking bacon moistened his mouth. The only other occupant of the room, Miss Minato, smiled at them from over her cup of hot cocoa as they entered.  

            "Goodness, you all look like you've been to war!"

            "We have!" Akito assured her, placing an arm about each child. "And believe me, fighting grasshoppers is nothing compared to those two!"

            "Hee-hee!" Yurika produced her shrill laugh. "Have you been bullying your father Ruri?"

            "He started it," Ruri murmured, totally deadpan. The two women just chuckled at that. 

            Hari blew on his hands and rubbed them together, trying to get some heat back into them. Then he saw a free space over by the radiator and immediately dashed over to press his back against it. Ruri followed at a more dignified pace to lean beside him. Yurika beamed at them as she turned over the bacon. 

"These are just about done kids! Could you set the table for me, Ruri?" 

            "Yes Mother," Ruri went to obey her. Hari followed her, but she immediately dismissed his help with a small hand-gesture. It was a one person job.   

            "Oh, and Hari, could you tell the other kids that lunch is ready?" Yurika asked. 

            "Oh I'll get them!" Minato said, noticing the boy's reluctance to part with the heater. "Let him stay and warm up!" She upped and left the room, surprising Hari by ruffling his hair fondly as she walked past him.            

"Here we are!" Yurika placed a large platter of bacon sandwiches on the table. "Come on and dig in! They'll warm you up for certain!"

"Thank you, Miss Misumaru," Hari took a sandwich, attacked it with ketchup and tucked in eagerly. His ravenous cramming was far less elegant than Ruri's delicate little bites, especially when he got a mouthful stuck in his throat and began to choke.  

Ruri absently thumped him on the back. "That's what you get for rushing your food," she reprimanded him.

Hari coughed a few more times then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Hey Ruri, about what you said earlier…"

            "What? What did I say?"

"You remember, we were talking about what Christmas means to us. You never took your turn."

"No I didn't," she said, shaking her head. "And I don't intend to yet. I think you should work it out for yourself." A little mischief touched those flawless golden eyes. "Think on it, and let me know what you come up with."

"What? Hey, that's not fair!"     Hari blurted. 

"I agree, who would have thought that sweet and innocent Ruri would end up being such a tease?"

Both children jolted at that and whirled around to confront Yukina, beaming mockingly at them. Mikoto stood a step behind her, wearing the exact same grin.

"Oh hi you two," he said. "How are you doing?"

            "Just peachy thanks! By the way Ruri, there's something I wanted to ask you in private." Before Ruri could react, Yukina had dragged her insistently to the other end of the table, leaving Hari at Mikoto's clutches. She bounded up to him cheerfully and shoved her girlish smile uncomfortably close to his face.  

"So Hari, my dear! How are _you_ this afternoon?"

"Erm, I'm fine Mikoto," he replied, uneasily leaning back so that her warm breath wasn't on his face so much. 

"Glad to hear it. I'm great too of course!" she laughed. "You know, I was just thinking that you've spent an awful lot of time outside. Maybe you should stay indoors with us and chill out a bit this afternoon. It'll be fun! We got up to level 99 in _Guardians of Orion_, but we can't defeat the final boss. But with your skill I bet you could do it with your eyes closed! So how about it, huh?" She leaned in closer again.

"Er, maybe," he mumbled, leaning further back. "I'll see what Ruri's doing."

Mikoto's face fell instantly. "Oh don't be like that Hari! You don't have to follow her _everywhere_. You're not Siamese twins you know!"

"Yeah, but she's my friend," Hari murmured pathetically. 

"Yeah, so? She's my friend too! Honestly, you two are as bad as each other!" she huffed, overdramatically ramming her fists into her hips. 

"Well, she may want to go outside again. I wouldn't want her to go all by herself." 

"Ruri this, Ruri that. All anyone ever thinks about is Ruri," Mikoto sighed, glaring over at the girl in question. It was competitive to the bone, but Hari didn't know enough about women to interpret it that way. Instead he chuckled nervously then very deliberately turned back to Ruri, who was obliviously thumbing through some envelopes. 

"Are these today's Christmas cards?" she asked her mother.

"Oh yes," Yurika replied. "We got a good haul today!"

Ruri flicked through them quickly, chucking one after the other into a discard pile. "I don't know any of these people," she said, almost as a complaint. 

"You wouldn't, they're all friends from my student days," Yurika informed her. "Try some of the unopened ones at the bottom of the pile, maybe you'll have more luck."

Ruri obliged. "Oh yes. Goodness, there are loads of them. Will you help me with them Hari?"

"Oh sure," Hari took the nearest one and opened it. He slipped the card out, took a quick look at the Christmas tree on the front and then opened it to read the contents. To his surprise, the sender sounded familiar. Yes, he'd definitely heard the name before, but he couldn't put a face to it. 

"Hey I recognise this name!" he announced triumphantly.

"Who is it?" Ruri asked. 

"Erina Won. Yeah, it's definitely familiar." 

Ruri cast him a startled look. "Really? Erina? Let me see." She took the card from him and stared at it in disbelief.  

"Erina?" Akito echoed in surprise, looking down at the card over Ruri's shoulder. "Hmm, I'm surprised we got one from her."

"I am as well," Ruri murmured, examining it cautiously as if it might be booby-trapped. "After everything that's happened between us."

"Yeah," agreed Yurika, coming over to look as well. "I mean we already got the Nergal Christmas card, so it's surprising she sent us a separate one. But still, it was very nice of her!" She looked up as her husband. "Did we send one to her Akito?"

Akito tipped his head back as he racked his memory. "No, I don't think we did,"

"Oh dear, now I feel bad!" Yurika sighed. "Oh well, we'll include her when we send out our New Years letter!"

"Erina Won," Hari murmured, looking to the ceiling as he tried to recall her. "Didn't I talk to her at the reunion bash?"

"Yes," Ruri nodded. "You discussed bosun-jumping at length with her,"

"She was the tall blonde one then?"

"No, that was Miss Fressange. Erina was the one with dark hair. If you recall she made a comment about us being long-lost siblings," she added grudgingly.  

"Oh _her_!" Hari cried. "Yeah I remember now! That Nergal secretary person!" 

            "Yes, that is the one." 

            "She was on the Nadesico with you, right?"

            "Yes."

"Of course. And she has a pretty bad rep with you lot doesn't she?"

"Indeed," Ruri nodded. "During the war, she withheld vital information on the true nature of our enemy and assisted Akatsuki with his traitorous schemes. Not to mention the fact she wanted to endanger Akito's life for the mere purpose of heightening her status in Nergal."

"Really? All that?" Hari shrugged. "She didn't seem that bad when I met her."

"She is not purely evil," Ruri admitted. "She knows what righteousness is, but her own selfish streak prevents her from acting in its best interests. It is a pity, but it is a weakness she has and one that Akatsuki exploits to full effect."

"I see. That's a shame," Hari said, taking the card back again and rereading the contents. The card contained a generic Christmas message, around which Erina had written, 'To Akito, Yurika and Ruri' and 'from Erina'. Simple, effective and to the point. However, on closer inspection he noticed that the 'om' of the 'from' had been smeared into a blurry star-shaped pattern. He was about to dismiss it as a smear, when his logical mind noticed the way it was branching off in all directions, rather than just one. It was as if a drop of water had landed on the ink before it could dry spreading it every which way to create this little mess. He considered this, simultaneously wondering why he was concerned with something so trivial. 

_"Maybe a raindrop? Nah, not likely. She would have had to been writing this outside, or next to an open window for that to happen. Hmm, I wonder. Could it be…a teardrop, maybe?" _

That was a disturbing theory. A compassionate boy like him couldn't let the idea go easily. It ate at him so much that he showed it to Ruri and asked her opinion of it. She took it from him and studied it curiously. 

"It's not a hand-smudge and I doubt it's from spilled water as only a single point is blemished," she replied with notable speed. "I believe it was caused by a single, small drop of water." 

"Then you agree with me," said Hari. "It was caused by a teardrop? She was crying when she wrote this?"    

"Possibly," Ruri said. "But it is impossible to say for certain. You shouldn't let your imagination run away with you."

"Why would she be crying?" Hari wondered out loud. 

"I don't know. On the grounds that her career with Nergal is the most important thing in her life, I'd imagine it's something to do with that, if anything. We shouldn't dwell on it," 

"You reckon? You don't think it could be something else?"

Ruri gave him an exasperated smile. "How many questions do you want to ask? I'm not an expert on Erina Won you know."

"Ah, sorry." 

A pause fell between them and Ruri returned to sorting through the cards. But it wasn't long before Hari spoke again.

"Ruri, what if it's not so simple? What if it's something other than her job that's making her sad?" He ran a finger along his chin, his mouth sagging uneasily. "I was thinking…what if she's crying because she's lonely?"

Ruri tilted her head to consider this. "It is certainly a possibility," she admitted. "I can't think of any friends she has, unless you count Akatsuki, which we probably can't if we're honest." She gave a little sigh of pity. "She's very selfish by nature and not very well-adapted to be around other people."

"Still, it must be tough being alone for Christmas."  

Ruri agreed with a little nod. "No-one deserves to be alone at this time of year."

Silence followed, in which several little thoughts nibbled at Hari's conscience. He turned on his chair and stared out of the window into the snowy world outside, chewing his mouthful slowly as he considered Erina's possible plight.  

_"Alone. All alone. At a time when everyone else is getting together to be happy. That's got to be hard for her."_

He knew that from experience. Before this one, he'd never had a proper Christmas with family or friends. It was always harder to share the spirit of the season, when there weren't others celebrating it with you. Other people were what made Christmas what is was.

_            "Damn it! Why do people have to be unhappy at this time of year? It's not right, everyone should enjoy Christmas!"_    __

"Hari?" It was only when Ruri said his name that he noticed he'd been scowling into space for several seconds. He started, then grinned at her sheepishly to try and cover his tracks.

"You seem distracted. Is something on your mind?" There was real concern in her voice.

"Well," Hari hesitated, mentally um-ing and ah-ing whether he should tell her or not. In the end he went for it. If he couldn't tell his closest friend, then who could he tell?

"It's just…Ruri, I think we should do something to help her!" he blurted out.

"You mean Erina?" Ruri leaned her elbows on the table and faced him with her head in her hands, and an amused smile on her lips. It was almost as if she had seen this outburst coming. "What do you propose?"

"Well, I was thinking maybe…..no," Hari shook his head, suddenly regretting his spontaneity. "No, maybe not, don't worry about it." 

"You were thinking of inviting her here?" Ruri ventured, hitting the target dead on. 

"I guess so," Hari replied awkwardly. "But that's beyond my station really, as a guest."

"But it's not beyond mine," Ruri asserted. 

"Huh?"

"I think it's a wonderful idea," Ruri said, beaming at him. "For it is up to the privileged ones to help the needy, especially at this time of year. We have more than enough room for another person."

"But Ruri, you don't even like her," Hari reminded her quietly. "I remember you telling me how she was one of three people on the Nadesico who you didn't like."

"True. But maybe an act of kindness will release the person behind the monster," Ruri said. "After all that was certainly true in my case," she added, casting a fond glance over to her parents conversing on the other side of the table. 

            "Well, it certainly is the season for this kind of thing, I guess," Hari said, absently scratching his cheek.

            "Precisely."

"Then it's settled. Great!" said Hari, pushing his chair back as he stood up. "Let's go!"

Ruri blinked twice in quick confusion. "Huh? Go where?"

"To fetch her of course!" said Hari, eyes widening. "You said you wanted to invite her, didn't you?"

"We're fetching her in person?" Ruri asked, suddenly uneasy. She seemed daunted by the prospect. 

"Sure we are!" He abruptly pushed his chair back and stood. "Come on, let's go!" he said, gesturing her up. 

"O..okay," Ruri stammered. She rose slowly, seemingly overwhelmed by this burst of enthusiasm. 

"Thanks for lunch, Miss Misumaru!" Hari called out as they raced out the kitchen door, his face flushed with excitement while Ruri's was contorted with fond exasperation. In an eye-blink they were gone, leaving only the swinging door behind them.   

"Oh, you're….welcome," Yurika trailed off, finding herself talking to their wake. 

Everyone stared at the door through which the two prodigies had just vanished, bemused at their sudden exit. "What do they have to do in such a hurry?" Akito wondered aloud. 

Minato grinned slyly. "Something naughty I'll bet!"  

*          *            *

            _Tick, tock, tick, tock_

            How could blank seconds be so painful? The sounds of the clock reminded her of how pointless and empty her life was, how she drifted along through time, never touching anyone's lives in any way that wasn't to do with her profession. Another deadly rush of self-loathing rose up in her. She took up her blade, gripping the handle until her fingers were bloodless then rammed the blade down hard into her desk, channelling all those negative emotions into a single solid strike. That served to release the surge of anguished fury, calming it into the numbing depression she was more accustomed to. Breathing madly, she gradually released her grip on the knife, leaving it stuck upright in the wood. She wondered how many more times she would have spells like these before she could finally succumb to the perverse yearning within her. 

            Still trembling from the sudden outburst, she rose and crossed the room to the kitchen to make herself a sandwich and a cup of tea. Busying herself with simple tasks like this was a way of giving herself a 'break' from the pain. She'd used the method several times over the last year and it was a sure-fire short-term solution to her depression. Unfortunately she had never found such a simple answer for the longer-term problem.   

As she came back into the living room, sandwich in one hand, steaming mug in the other, she unwittingly looked over to her Christmas card collection (if it could really be called that) on the windowsill. More anguish flowed through her at the sight of it. She'd only actually received one card and mockingly it was the Nergal one which everyone in the company, from the chairman himself down to the lowly janitors, would have received. And it was sad to think that even those janitors would have received more cards than she had. Plus they'd have homes to go to and loving families to celebrate the festive season with, Erina thought bitterly. Sheesh, when had she become so pathetic that she envied the guy who scrubbed shit off loo-seats for a living?  

            She finished lunch quickly and returned her concentration to her suicide note. She'd long since decided she should have one, her professional need for completeness coming into play there. It was also a parting shot of sorts – she hoped that someone would read it and feel guilty about letting her life sink to such a depth. At first she'd thought it would be easy to write, but a few snags had cropped up to make it more difficult. 

            _"Why am I bothering to write this? I mean, it's not like I have anyone to write it _to_. Chances are the police will be the only ones who see it," _

            It was too true. Only a few would ever see it and even fewer would care that she was gone. Only Akatsuki would, but that would only be because of the loss of a skilled and trusted employee, not as a person or a friend. There was no way she would address it to him, for that would feel like she had lost to him, the one man who was both the greatest help and hindrance to those ultimate ambitions that had once ruled her life. 

            She would leave it general. She'd make it short and to the point – she was good at that. After all, she didn't have Izumi's aptitude for poetry. Hell, if she had, she'd have probably found mirth in her tragedy.       

            It took her twenty minutes to finish it, by which time the tears were flowing freely down her face. There was no doubt in her mind, her life had to end tonight. Barely ten hours remained now and the merciless clock was ticking ever onwards…

**A/N – Ugh, I hate writing chapters with that much dialogue. Hope it was okay though. Chapter 3 shouldn't take so long to complete and will probably be up some time this weekend, if not before. See you then.**


	4. Go! Go! Adventure Begins!

**Chapter 3 – Go! Go! Adventure Begins!**

_1:58 pm__, __24th December 2198___

            "Mother!" Ruri called. "Hari and I are going out for a walk. Is that all right with you?"

            "Of course it is, Ruri darling!" Yurika replied, raising her shrill voice to glass-shattering levels so it would reach her daughter in the hallway. "But wrap up warm and don't be back too late! Are you wearing your scarf?"

            "Yes, mother," 

            "Then have a good time!" 

            "Thank you. See you later, mother," Her sentence was punctuated by the sound of the front door closing. Yurika peered through the kitchen window and watched them with fondness, as together they walked down the snowy drive. 

            Minato chuckled, as she wiped a tea-towel over the wet plate in her hand. "Aren't those two just adorable together?" 

            "Yes, they really are," Yurika replied, dunking another dish into the basin of sudsy water. "They're like two peas in a pod!"

            "So what do you think? Is it just a friendship? Or has our little Ruri-Ruri discovered young love?" Minato's gaze sparkled with the prospect. 

            "I don't know," Yurika said. "It would make me really happy to see Ruri with a boyfriend, especially with a nice boy like Hari. But I really don't know if she's looking for anything like that at the moment. They're both only twelve years old you know. They probably don't think about things like that yet."

            "Oh I'm not so sure!" Minato said. "I think they're perfect for each other!  

And after all, _you_ found your true love by the age of five, didn't you?"

            "True, I guess," Yurika admitted with a smile. "But let's not pressure them. They can sort out what they feel for each other by themselves in their own time. And in any case as long as they enjoy each other's company, I'm happy." 

            Minato huffed. "Honestly you're far too patient. If it was my daughter we were talking about, I wouldn't stop pestering them until they'd at least shared a kiss together!" She sighed happily. "Oh well, never to worry. When Ruri's finally done with puberty he won't be able to resist her!"

            "Oh shush, you!" Yurika rebuked her with a light slap on the shoulder. Minato smirked back at her and the pair returned to the task at hand. After the last plate had been washed, Yurika plunged her hands into the warm, foamy water of the wash-basin and thought about her daughter and the little boy lucky enough to get all her attention.  

            _"Have you really let yourself fall in love with him, Ruri?" _she wondered, giving herself a little smile at the thought._ "How wonderful it would be if you had!"_

*          *          *

"Here it comes!" Hari announced, staring intently at the approaching train. "Get ready for it Ruri."

            "Right,"            

            The train slid slowly into the station and came to a stop. A moment later, the doors opened with a lavish hiss. 

            "Now! Come on, let's go!" Hari shouted, grasping her hand and pulling her forward through the animated crowd of people, boarding and leaving the train. The carriage they were heading for was packed – he knew they'd have to fight if they wanted a place on it.

            Fortunately, two small children could easily slide through the cracks in the throng and made it inside with only a slight battering. Once in, they proceeded to the far end of the carriage, away from the mayhem of moving people. Hari lead the way, gallantly opening up a path for Ruri with the force of his own body. Predictably, there were no seats available so they settled for standing in one of the less crowded spots.

            "Pretty crowded huh?" he said.

            "Christmas traffic," Ruri replied. Hari nodded to concur. 

            Once the carriage had been stuffed full to bursting, the doors closed and the train began on its way. To balance themselves, Hari and Ruri grasped the same vertical pole – neither of them were tall enough to reach the hand holds on the ceiling. Although they were wedged in by all the people, they managed to reach a position where they were facing each other. Awkwardly though, their faces were barely a foot apart. It was uncomfortable, but they could tolerate it for an hour.                

"Not that I'm complaining," Ruri started suddenly. "But why is it so important for us to fetch her in-person?"

Hari replied with what would have been a shrug, if he'd had space to properly move his shoulders. "It's just more personal. If we make the effort to go and get her, she'll _know_ she's wanted. Don't you think?" 

"I see." Ruri replied, convinced. "That's good thinking. You understand people much better than I do Hari." Then, a touch of humour in her voice, she added, "You have a heart bigger than your mind!"

            He chuckled at that, not knowing whether it was meant to be a compliment or a reprimand, but sure he would accept either from her, his number one girl. Then a thought suddenly occurred to him and he spoke it out loud. 

            "I've just thought, if Erina's actually got plans for Christmas, we're going to look kind of silly."

            Ruri narrowed her eyes to mocking crescents. "You should have considered that before we got on this train."

            Hari panicked for a moment. Was he about to drag Ruri to Hiratsuka and back for some pointless wild goose chase? Fortunately, Ruri was on hand to set his mind to rest. "Don't look so worried. It doesn't matter what the scenario turns out to be. If nothing else, it will be a nice day out," she said, smiling to reassure him. Hari gave her a guilty chuckle of relief, while scratching the back of his head. She was right, of course. There probably wasn't anything better to kill the tension of Christmas Eve than a day out.  

_"And it's more than just that – it's a day out alone with her." _Unwittingly, he grinned into space. _"It'll be great!"_

Just then the train eased to a halt. This stop seemed to be very popular if you went by the number of people who were getting off here. Suddenly, there was space to breath again and, to Hari's delight, an elderly gentleman relinquished his seat to disembark. He dashed over to claim it before anyone else could. 

"Ruri, there's a seat here if you want it," he said, calling her over. 

"Oh. Thank you," she said, nodding gratefully to him as she came over to take it However, the moment her behind touched the seat, a tall youth in a tatty brown jacket paced up to her. The smell of cigarettes hung repulsively around him, while his shaven head and nose piercing made the scowl on his face look all the more dangerous. 

"Oi, I saw that seat first! Get off, bitch!" Before Ruri could react, he had grabbed her wrist with strong, stumpy fingers. Then with one fierce movement he yanked her off the seat onto the floor. She yelped in surprise as she fell. By the time she'd stood up again, her seat had been conquered. 

"What the…? Hey!" Hari's initial disbelief turned to anger and he stepped forward, drawing himself up. "That seat was hers, you mean bully! You'd better apologise to her and give it back or else!"

The youth looked over at him incredulously and laughed. "Heh, and just what you gonna do kid? You wanna fight me?" He squared up to him. "Come on I dare you, have a swipe!"

Hari took a quick glance around the carriage. None of the other passengers paid any attention to the scuffle, instead adhering to the train-rider tradition of minding their own business, and no-one else's. Then it was up to him alone. This yob was taller than him, even when sitting down, and was no doubt far stronger than him. Still, he wouldn't let anyone push his Ruri around like this unpunished!

            "Come on, you chicken-shit!" The bully shoved Hari's shoulder roughly. It didn't hurt, but it sent him back a couple of steps. Hari gritted his teeth in rage. Right, that was it! With a growl, he drew his fist back, ready to launch.  

"No, Hari," 

            Before he could strike, Ruri's icy fingers closed around his prepped fist. With gentle, yet effective, force they took his hand down to replace it by his side. She then entwined her fingers with his and tried to lead him away. Hari resisted her pull stubbornly.

"Ruri, I can't just…"

"Never mind him. Come on." There was a note of finality in her voice that made it clear that it wasn't for negotiation, as did the cool hand that grasped his own. Reluctantly Hari let himself be pulled away towards the other end of the carriage, the youth's laughter following him all the way down the aisle. 

When the pair came to an opening in the crowd, Hari shook Ruri's hand off his and confronted her. His brow and voice were both quivering dangerously with the anger he felt.

"Ruri, that bastard insulted you and stole your seat!" he spat. "Are you really going to let him get away with it?"

As ever, Ruri was the very picture of calmness, contrasting fiery Hari perfectly. She spoke to him indifferently. "It really doesn't matter. Let him have the seat. It would be more trouble than it's worth to get it back."

"But we can't just let him win! That was _your seat!" Hari thrust a finger back in the direction, to make his point. _

Ruri remained serene. "Like I said, it doesn't matter. I don't mind standing, it's not a very long journey."

"No, we have to get it back! It's not just about the seat. It's a matter of pride!"

Ruri sighed. "A matter of pride. Those very words nearly killed a good friend of mine. And pride brought out all the worst traits of the woman who we are now travelling to visit. Pride is capable of horrible things if left unchecked."

Hari had no good reply to that and caved to her, bowing his head like a rebuked child. Ruri patted him on the shoulder twice. 

"If you must, take comfort in the fact that someone with such a repugnant character is unlikely to have many friends to celebrate Christmas with."

"Huh, that's true," he said. "But I really want to go back there and teach him one or two things about treating ladies properly!" Unknown to him, Hari's false toughness sounded laughable coming from a scrawny boy like himself.

"Let him be. The last time someone tried to protect me they ended up very badly hurt." For a moment, she smiled, perhaps recalling a fond memory of some sort. "I definitely wouldn't want the same thing to happen to you."

Hari bobbed his head, but ended up scowling at the floor. 

"Hari?" she said, demanding he look at her. 

"Uh-huh?" Hari's head came up grudgingly. 

"Thank you for sticking up for me. That was really nice of you." She gave him another of her golden smiles that suddenly made the whole incident seem worthwhile.  

            "Er, you're welcome," he replied, bashfully running his fingers through his hair. "I wasn't going to let you take on him alone, was I?"

            "All the same, thank you. You are a very good friend." She gave him a secretive look. "You are my second knight as well,"

            "I am?" Hari awkwardly scratched the back of his head, the very image of humbleness. _"Her second_ knight? What does she mean by that?"_  He knew a few seconds panic at the thought of another man in Ruri's life, but then realised that she'd probably been talking about her father. Phew, what a relief that was. Getting Ruri's love would be hard enough without having to compete for her affections.   _

            The train sped onward through the winter afternoon, carrying the children ever closer to Hiratsuka, where unbeknown to them a tempest of bright and dark emotions lay in wait for them. 

*          *          *

"What do you think those two are up to?" Mikoto asked, frowning as she looked through the living room window. 

Yukina didn't bother looking up from the screen. "Who are you talking about?" 

she asked, without much interest.

"You know who I mean! Hari and Ruri of course!" the purple-haired girl snapped with a scowl. "Out there together all by themselves." Her eyebrows met darkly. "I bet they're smooching!"           

"Ruri? Ha! No chance." Yukina said, sending a barrage of torpedoes towards the alien mother-ship with a twiddle of her thumb.  

"I'm not so sure. They've been together ever since he arrived. There must something between them!"

Yukina cringed as all her missiles exploded harmlessly off the target's shields.

"Why do you care so much anyway?" she asked, pulling back on the joystick to perform an evasive manoeuvre.

"Well, it's not like I care. But it's improper, isn't it?"  

"Sounds like you're jealous to me," Yukina replied, hitting the pause button so she could face her. "Jealous that Ruri is getting all of Hari's attention." She smirked playfully, then broke out into song. _"Hari and Mikoto sitting in a tree! K-I-S…"_

"S-shut up!" Mikoto covered her cheeks with her hands as they turned red. "Why would I ever want to go out with someone like _him!?"_

"You tell me!" said Yukina as she restarted her game. "You're the one who fancies him."

            "Do not! It's just that Ruri and him just don't go together at all! How can someone as positive as Hari want to possibly want to date gloomy old Ruri. It's not right! I mean, honestly!" She glared at Yukina, as if she was the source of all her frustration. "I mean, doesn't it bother you?"    

Yukina delayed her answer as she was still desperately trying to escape from the pursuing wave of aliens. Unfortunately, she was outnumbered and outgunned, so despite some nifty thumb-work she wasn't able to stop her nemeses from carving up her ship with their energy beams. Defeated, she spoke the next remark more harshly than she had intended. "Why should it? If Ruri wants to date a loser like him, then power to her, but don't expect me to care. I've got more important things to worry about."

"Yeah? Like what?"

"Like how to beat that damn mother-ship. I can't see how it can be done without more firepower." She cocked her head ponderously. "Maybe if we used a faster craft, we can do a kind of hit-and-run manoeuvre or something."

"Oh, give me the damn joy-pad," Mikoto snapped, yanking it off her. "I'll show you how the pro plays!" 

            "Go ahead," Yukina said, lying down on her back to stare at the ceiling. "But I think we'll have to get Ruri or Hari to do this one for us,"        

            At that point, there was a knocking on the living room which broke Mikoto's concentration and caused her to fly straight into a wall, much to her annoyance. The door opened and Minato popped her head in. 

            "Oh, hi you two. Jun and Megumi are here, will you come to say hello?"

"Okay," replied Yukina, hauling herself to her feet with a grunt. Mikoto switched off the console and did likewise.              

            Scanning the room, Minato added, "I don't suppose Ruri and Hari are back yet?"

"Nope," Yukina shook her head. "Haven't seen them since lunch."

"Hmm," Minato touched her lower lip ponderingly. "They've been gone a long time. I wonder what they're up to," Her mischievous smile made her implication obvious, making Mikoto frown again.  "Oh, well never mind. Let's go meet the new arrivals!"

The two girls followed Minato out of the room. As they passed through the door, Yukina elbowed the younger girl in the ribs, with more force than was really necessary.

"Hey, how lucky for you! You can get some good advice off Miss Reinard. After all she's the expert on love triangles!" 

"Zip it, you skank!" snapped Mikoto, wrinkling her nose at her and striding angrily away. 

*          *          *

_To Whom It May Concern,_

_ I've chosen to take my own life, for many reasons that those interested to know can work out for themselves. I'll just say that these past few years have been very emotionally painful for me and that I don't have the strength to cope with yet another. This world doesn't want or need me, so I will leave it tonight.  By the time anyone reads this I will be long gone, by my own choice. No-one will miss me, so there is little point in writing anything further. _

_With greetings from beyond the grave,_

_Erina Kinjo Won_

            It was almost poetic in its lack of poetry, and yet it seemed disappointing for twenty minutes work. Hell, who gave a fuck. Wasn't like she was going to be around when anyone read it.  

            The penultimate act had been done and only a handful of hours remained until the day that would mark the birth of the ultimate saviour and the death of the ultimate sinner. Only one question remained. Could she really resist the kiss of the blade for that long?

**A/N – Being the only other two children in the story other than the 'ri duo, I figured it would makes sense that Yukina and Mikoto would hang out together. However, since they actually have fairly similar strong-willed personalities I've tried using the happy-go-lucky side of Yukina seen in the movie in order to distinguish between them.**

**Chapter 4 is well underway and contains what I consider some of the cutest moments in the whole fic! Should be completed some time this week, so look out for it then.**


	5. Winter Wonderland

**Chapter 4 – Winter Wonderland**

_3:23 pm__, __24th December 2198___

            There was no need to react when they came to their stop. When they arrived in Hiratsuka Central Station, they were simply carried by the torrent of the moving crowd wanting to disembark here. Hari tried to swim against the indomitable current, but his efforts had no effect and he was inevitably separated from his snow-white friend, engulfed in a tsunami of people. His breathing increased in panic, and as soon as he was able to, he fought his way through the crowd, shouting at the top of his voice. 

"Ruri? Ruri! Where are you?" He shoved his way onward. "Excuse me, can I get through please? Ruri, where are you? Are you okay? Ruri?"

            "I'm here Hari, there's no need to be so noisy," said Ruri, who had somehow emerged beside him, seemingly none the worse off from her struggles. Hari sighed in relief, then took her hand and carefully pulled her out of the swarm. 

            "Are you all right? I got worried when I lost sight of you."

            "I'm fine Hari. Honestly, it's just like you to get so worked-up over nothing," she rebuked him. "I guess it's now time for us to get to work."       

"Right!" Hari swung his backpack down onto the pavement and pulled out his sleek laptop. "I've got navigation software on this thing, so just give me a street name and I'll find it," he said.

Ruri checked the scrap of paper, on which she'd jotted down Erina's address. "We're looking for the Blossom Building on Lime Avenue."

"Lime Avenue," Hari murmured, typing it in. "Here, got it! It's twenty-one streets thataway!" he said shoving a finger eastwards. 

Ruri looked down at the screen over his shoulder. "We should try and find a bus route. A taxi would cost too much and take just as long with all this holiday traffic." 

"We could. Or…" Hari tapped a few more keys. "If you're up for it we could walk. There's a short-cut which goes right through the city's central park. Shouldn't take us to walk it and it might be kinda nice with the snow and everything." He looked up to Ruri for her opinion.

To his astonishment, something lit up in Ruri's eyes when he spoke and she clasped her hands together in front of her in sudden eagerness, staring at him imploringly. "That's a much better idea Hari! Can we do that?" 

"Er…sure," Hari said taken aback by this upbeat reaction. "Probably the best way in any case. No jams and it won't cost a yen." Quickly recovering his composure, he slammed his laptop shut. "Okay, let's get moving before we freeze!"                        

"Yes!" Ruri replied and together they headed off. 

It took them ten perilous minutes of crossing roads before they made it to the entrance of Hiratsuka Central Park. The colossal grassy patch they walked onto was swathed with messy snow, trampled by other people. A few people walking their dogs could be seen strolling along the park's paths and in the distance, on the slope of a small white knoll, several small children were sledging, shrieking in delight as they rushed down the hill and beyond to end up in a pile of snow and laughter. Their parents watched, faces torn between happiness and apprehension as they watched their offspring put their bones on the line.   

"They look like they're having fun," he noted. Ruri nodded to concur. 

Thought the sound of children laughing was heartening, Hari knew that his friend would prefer a more peaceful surrounding and so he took her along a more secluded path leading through a wooded area. Gradually, the screams behind them died away, until they were drowned out by the whistling of the winter wind in the bare branches above.      

As they wandered amid the naked trees, Ruri gingerly took his arm and linked it with her own, only explaining herself with a mysterious smirk. This uncharacteristic display of affection sent shivers down Hari's spine.

_"Wow. Walking like this makes us look like a couple!"_

            He let himself enjoy the fantasy for a moment longer before shaking it from his mind. 

_"Damn it Hari, don't get carried away. You might embarrass her if you assume too much,"_

            Trying to bring his mind back to the real world, he turned his focus to the path they were walking on. Tall trees surrounded them, leaves long since replaced by plentiful snow in their upper boughs. Holly bushes with blood red berries gave the scenery colour, as did the sporadic pine trees which retained their precious needles in defiance of the season. A solitary robin, breast as red as a wound, twittered cheerfully from atop a sapling as it watched them walk through this winter wonderland. Snow and seclusion had changed the landscape around them so much that it seemed as though they were walking on the surface of some fantastic faraway planet which knew nothing of civilisation and its stresses, only the constant peace and harmony of nature left to its own devices. The illusion was delightfully engrossing and Hari felt a pang of regret when the distant children's shouts woke him from it. 

            But Ruri was still on his arm and that was no illusion. The setting could barely be any more romantic, and here he was with the girl of his dreams, possessively clinging onto him like he was some treasured toy. It had to make him think. 

            _"She wouldn't do that if she didn't like me right? But how much _does_ she like me?"_

            Would he ever have the courage to find out?     

            The juvenile voices became louder as they walked further along the path, but these were different ones to those sledding on the hill. 

            "I wonder what all that commotion is." Ruri murmured quizzically. 

            "Don't know, let's find out," he said. When they came to a fork in the path, they took the one which lead towards the source of the noise. Within a minute, the trees gave way to open space. A clear land of snow lay beyond and in the near distance, a large frozen lake could be seen. Several skaters glided erratically around it, like bubbles in a boiling pot and created the noise which had attracted them.     

            "So that what it is," Ruri said.    

            "Uh-huh. Shall we take a closer look?"

            "Okay."

They started towards the lake. When the path faded into the field of snow, Ruri detached herself from him. His arm immediately felt lonely without hers to accompany it, but then a sudden idea occurred to him and restored his high spirits. He checked his watch. They had plenty of time to spare, and what was wrong with a little fun on Christmas Eve?

"Hey Ruri, let's go skate on the lake!" he suggested excitedly.

Ruri paled noticeably as she stared at him, which was no mean feat with her white complexion. "Ice-skating? I don't think so, I've never done it before."

"Don't worry, I'll teach you. Come on, it'll be fun!"

            He didn't give her a chance to back out. Grabbing her hand, he tugged her unwillingly to the lake. Her reluctance was obvious, but Hari was determined to get her out there on the ice. She was bound to enjoy it when she got going!

They rented the skates from a tent by the lakeside, pulled them on and waddled over to the ice. Hari launched himself first, gliding a graceful circle before coming to a halt to face Ruri.            

"Come on Ruri, come out here! The ice is great!"

Ruri bit her lip anxiously. "I'm not sure about this Hari."

            "There's nothing to worry about. Just give it a try."

Ruri took a deep breath, then stepped out onto the ice. Right away she began to wobble and waved her arms around frantically, until she fell over backwards onto the ice with a painful _crunch_.

"Woah! Are you okay?" Hari asked in alarm, sliding to her side. 

Cringing and clutching her hurt elbow, Ruri rolled over with a moan. "It's nothing serious, just a bruise," she replied through gritted teeth. By the side a few onlookers were tittering affably at her, amused by her fall. She flushed and scowled up at Hari, clearly blaming him for making her do this only to humiliate herself. "Let's pack it in," she stated blandly. "This is stupid." 

"No, come on Ruri," Hari implored her as he helped her up again. "Don't quit yet. Give me a chance to show you how it's done." 

            Ruri huffed and folded her arms petulantly. "Fine," 

            "Great. Okay, let's work on your technique," He offered her his arm to help her steady herself. She sluggishly shoved herself off the supporting fence and took it, reluctance emanating from her every feature. Hari refused to be discouraged, but he knew that the memory of this as a lovely afternoon, not to mention Ruri's good mood, was at stake here.

"Right, let's do the basics. The trick to keeping upright is to keep your feet

pointing outwards," He gestured at his own feet to show her. Ruri shifted her feet to imitate his, but in doing so fell forward onto her knees with a cry, dragging Hari down with her. Together they struck ice. Hari fell on top of her, but fortunately he broke his fall with hands, so sparing her any further pain. He chuckled as he righted first himself, then his friend. "Sorry, that was my bad! Should have kept my balance!"

Ruri wasn't sharing the funny side. "Hari…" she pleaded, her golden eyes shining desperately.  

            "Every beginner falls a few times, Ruri," he reassured her. "Don't let it discourage you. Try again, this time holding the fence." 

            "Very well," Her mittened hand gripped the railing like it was a cliff edge. Once again she gingerly adjusted herself into the position Hari had described. Hari observed her, adding in hints where they were needed.           

            "That's right! Now lean forward a bit and bend your legs a little more…there! Hold that position, that's it!"

            "Like this?"

            "Yeah, you've got it!" Hari shouted. "Now let's try it without the railing." 

            Ruri stared at him dubiously for a second, but in the end decided to trust him. Hesitantly, she removed her hand from the fence, keeping it hovering within reach for a few seconds before taking a breath and taking it away completely. She tottered a little, but kept herself upright this time.

"That's it. You're doing great Ruri! Now we'll skate around the perimeter. Take it slowly at first and concentrate on keeping your balance." Even to himself, Hari sounded like a proper tutor. 

            Cautiously and with constant fear in her eyes, Ruri complied, skating with slow, deliberate motions. Hari stayed by her side, encouraging her and correcting her flaws as they went. Slowly but surely, they completed four circuits of the lake, with Ruri becoming more confident with each one. On the first one, she fell over several times, but then on the second, she only went down twice. But on the third and fourth, she managed to stay on her feet the whole way around, skating with admirable competence for such little experience. Hari applauded her on her progress. 

"See? You're doing it!"

"I…am doing it!" Ruri breathed, true glee in her voice even as her eyes remained focused on the ice ahead. "Gosh, I never thought I would be able to!"

"You were bound to get it eventually Ruri. You didn't give up and now you're skating like a pro! Well done!" Hari said, triumphantly patting her on the shoulder. "So do you think you're ready for something more challenging now?" 

"I think it's your turn for a challenge now," said Ruri. "So try and catch me!" With a charming laugh, she put on a burst of speed to break away from him, her silken hair whipping out behind her like a cape. Hari gasped and set off in delighted pursuit.           

            "You can't escape me Ruri! I taught you everything you know!"

            She laughed again, weaving through the skaters as she made her getaway. Hot on her trail, he followed her, face red in exhilaration and fully sure that he wouldn't trade anything in the world for this moment of his life.  

*          *          *

            They ended up having so much fun that they lost all track of time. They skated together for a whole hour and by the time they came off the lake the sky had turned dark and the evening cold was beginning to set in. Ruri had made pleasing progress and was skating very adeptly by the end of the session. They'd played tag together, raced each other (Hari had won them all expect for the last one when a little kid had been in his way) and for the last ten minutes, Hari's highlight of the afternoon, they had just skated slowly together, side-by-side, hand in hand. Ruri had enjoyed the whole thing thoroughly and had even been reluctant to leave at the end. Hari had had to persuade her, reminding her that they had a job to do and promisingly to take her out again on Boxing Day. They'd both been red-faced and exhausted when they'd left the lake. 

            Now, the pair were taking a breather, not to mention a well-needed sugar fix, before they would move on to find Erina's apartment. They sat side by side on a little bench overlooking the lake, watching the skaters while drinking hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows. The hot beverage       produced an interesting dilemma, Hari noted. He could drink it and be warm inside, but in the cup it was defrosting his deadened hands. In the end, he settled for drinking it. Couldn't argue with the sugar.  

            Next to him, Ruri blew on her own cup. He gave her a nudge. "Admit it, you had fun after all!"

"Yes," Ruri nodded fervently. "It was wonderful. However, I've picked up more injuries in the last hour than I did throughout the whole Lizards War."

She'd delivered the line with a straight face, making Hari laugh out loud. She had a knack with those dry remarks. In unison they took a slug of drink, then leaned back and sighed contently. "It's started to snow again," Ruri commented, holding out her free hand to catch some snowflakes. A few settled on her pale palm and melted in its warmth. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

            "Yeah," Hari breathed, in awe of the pretty girl surrounded by the magical falling flakes. He felt her shiver beside him as the cold suddenly penetrated her. Instinctively he put his arm around her and pulled her closer, inviting her to share in his body heat. She accepted, shifting over closer and leaning her head on his shoulder. Its weight felt wonderful to him and he accepted it gratefully. Together they stared out over the wondrous lake.  

"Have you thought anymore on the meaning of Christmas, Hari?" she asked, without moving her head. 

"Well, a little I guess."

"And?" she pressed him. 

"Well, I…" He scratched his cheek to buy some thinking time. _"God, what does she want me to say?" With eyes narrow in thought, he looked out over the icy lake in search of inspiration. Strangely enough, he found it._

"Um, is it…this?" he said, gesturing at the scene before them with his free hand. He could think of no way to capture the warm feelings and beauty before him in a sentence. A magnificent Christmas tree dominated over the icy lake, on which both children and lovers skated, laughing, dancing, playing, chasing one another, racing too and fro and having the most wonderful time together. Falling snow danced around them on a background of a majestic purple sky. It seemed as good an advert for Christmas as there could be and it was impossible not to glow inside looking at it. 

Ruri smiled a little, sharing in his fondness of the view. "You're getting closer," she said.

            "But still not quite there," Hari murmured to himself. _"Still can't figure out what she's looking for. Guess I'll have to think on it some more." _

            As he contemplated the problem and Ruri stared out over the lake from his shoulder, the silence grew long. Ruri broke it with another query. "Hari, may I ask you a question?"

"Another one?" Hari laughed. "Sheesh, it's like I'm on a game show here!"

"I'm sorry Hari. It's okay, forget I spoke," she replied, backing down despondently. 

"No, no, please go ahead Ruri. I was only kidding, ask away."

Ruri looked down at the steaming cup in her hands, tracing her thumb on the outside of the ring. "It's something that's been bothering me. It's just that you're so passionate about everything and so animated with your feelings. I on the other hand, am impassive, robotic and dull. And yet we're still friends. I suppose what I don't understand," she said, taking a pause to find words, "is how one as full of life as you can find pleasure in spending company with one as bland as me."  

            Hari could barely find words to express his incredulity. _She_ was apologising for spending time with _him_?! How ridiculous was that?!

"What are you talking about Ruri?" he blurted in disbelief. "You're not bland! You're smart, caring and fun to be with. I really like spending time with you," he placed a reassuring hand on her knee. "Really, I promise I do,"

            "I'm really glad to hear that," she said. "I love being with you as well," She turned her head to him, smiling delightfully, her eyes closed and small mouth upturned. Hari returned her smile, thankful that he'd been able to cheer her up. 

"Thank you so much for today, Hari. I cannot remember the last time I had this much fun. Thank you," 

And then, incredibly, she leaned in and gave him a tender little peck on the cheek. The touch of her soft white lips against his skin turned it to flame and his stunned mind to mush. He stared at her incredulously, one hand straying up to his blessed cheek. She just smirked back at him as if what she'd done had been no big deal. They were near to each other now – any closer and she would have been in his arms. 

            _"Now's the time! Kiss her, kiss her, kiss her! Damn it Hari, just do it!"_

            He couldn't. He couldn't put their friendship, not to mention her dignity, on the line so recklessly. She was too precious for him to lose her completely. So he kept his mouth in a dopy grin, knowing that he would hate himself later on.

            "We should get going," Ruri said eventually. Did he imagine the disappointment in her voice? He certainly couldn't keep it out of his own. 

            "Yeah, it's already late. Let's move," Reluctantly he stood up, his skin screaming in protest as he broke body contact with Ruri. As they walked side-by-side towards the park's exit, she had reverted into the girl who was his friend and nothing more. Back to square one, as if this romantic outing through the park counted for nothing. 

            _"Nice work, you bumbling idiot! She gave you a golden opportunity and you totally blew it!" _

            All he could hope for was another chance to come around, and then there was no way he was going to let it pass by. For now though, they had a job to do and it was high time they knuckled down and did it.          

*          *          *

Erina was scared.

It was early evening now and the six hour mark had been and gone. For the first time Erina was having doubts. Could she really bring herself to draw her own blood tonight? She wondered is she had been fooling herself when she'd thought of taking to the knife. Would her courage fail her when the decisive moment came? Did she really have the mettle to spill her own lifeblood? But equally terrifying was the thought of waking up tomorrow to face another day of emotional agony. And another, and another…oh, the pain would go on forever.     

Darkness had already fallen outside, but rather than switch the lights on, Erina had lit every one of her candles, which were scattered around her living room. They came in all shapes and sizes, all colours and curvatures. Squat ones standing by themselves at the low points in the room, slender pink ones elegantly stretching for the ceiling, tiny white circular ones bunched together like a herd, thick Christmassy ones of red and gold with holly at their bases, tacky novelty ones shaped like oranges and lemons and many other ones. Together they lit the room dimly, but they had a latent function too – many of them contained incense and their combined aromas fused together to make a nauseating smell which dulled her mind and helped to blunt her doubts. With her mind swimming as it was, suicide suddenly seemed much less daunting. 

            The knife on the table beckoned her enticingly. _"Pick me up," _it said. _"Take me, cut with me. Then all your sorrow and pain will be over and those sins and woes that haunt you will be lost in the past." _

            Be damned with the original plan. The blade was offering too much. She wouldn't resist it any longer. The time to end everything was now. With rickety bone-like fingers she reached for it, dizzy with anticipation of the emotional release she sought.  

A knocking came at the door, the instant she touched the hilt. Erina froze. Crazily, she wondered if this was Death coming for her. Rationality took over and she knew that someone of flesh and blood on the door. Who on earth was it and what the hell did they want with a suicidal secretary? 

The knocking came again and she began to panic. Now what should she do? If she cut herself now, there was the chance these intruders would find her and fetch her medical help. She knew she didn't have the strength to fail in this and come back the world as someone who couldn't even take her own life properly. But if she didn't act now and she talked to someone, she would lose all this courage that it had taken so long to build up and she would live through the agony all over again. It was a harsh dilemma which ended in indecision. She simply sat there with the quivering knife held dangerously over her wrists. 

            "Miss Won, are you here?" She gasped as the door opened revealing two equally surprised children. The scrawny dark-haired boy and the pasty white girl wore the same horrified gape of realisation as they saw her holding the blade.

            "Oh my God,"

            That did it. Without further hesitation Erina slashed at her wrists. 


	6. Candles in the Gloom

**A/N – Thanks for the latest reviews people, you're really encouraging me! In particular, thanks to those who have reviewed chapter after chapter. It's always nice to update, knowing that at least _someone will read it! ^_^ I'm sorry about the lateness of the update, but this is the most important scene in the story and so I needed to spend some time on it. Hope you like it. _**

**BTW Dennisud, you did make a good point in your review that Erina probably wouldn't kill herself in front of the children. However, I believe she would for a couple of reasons. Firstly, her massive pride – for her, the only thing worse than being in the low state she's sunken too is having an enemy (of sorts, in Ruri) see it too, so perhaps she'd be impulsive to avoid the scenario altogether. Also, remember she is absolutely terrified of facing another Christmas alone and was already about to cut herself before the children came in. She can't deal with people at the moment and any contact with them may keep her chained to a life she hates. Such a thought may push her to cut now rather than risk any more pain. Still, I could always be wrong about this. I've never been suicidal before, so I can only imagine what it would be like for her and what her reasoning would be like.**

**Chapter 5 – Candles in the Gloom **

_6:03 pm__, __24th December 2198___

            Hari registered the situation in a second. A person holding a blade aloft outside of their kitchen always meant trouble, and from the way she held it, Hari could suss her intentions. 

            He acted without thinking. No sooner had he seen her, he found himself sprinting across the room at full pelt. In the space of five steps, he crossed the room, hopped onto the coffee table and dove for her wrists. The momentum took both of them over and down onto the couch, but though Hari had Erina's knife wrist in his grasp, she still had firm hold of the blade. She cried out and struggled against him, twisting in his clutches and clawing at him like a beast with her free hand. Hari was unprepared for such resistance and instinctively turned away from her, relinquishing his hold on her hand. Before he could regain himself, she roughly pushed him off her, drew her hand back and slapped him hard around the face. The _crack_ it made felt as sharp as it sounded.  

            "Just what do you think you're doing!? How dare you come in here and assault me like this!" Erina snarled, her hair dishevelled and furious veins throbbing at her temples.  

            "Hey, you were about to cut yourself!" Hari protested in anger while rubbing his raw cheek. "I wasn't going to let you do that, was I?" 

            "What I do is my own business, you rat!"

            "We're not going to let you take your own life Miss Won!" Hari said, extending a hand to her. "Now give me the knife!"

            "Get out! Now!" Erina screeched, thrusting a trembling finger to the doorway.   

            "Give me the knife," Hari repeated calmly, taking a tentative step towards her.

            "Stay away from me!" she screamed, taking a swipe at him with the blade. It was a warning rather than an actual attack, but it did cause Hari to flinch back with a startled grunt. 

            "Hari!" Ruri's concerned cry came from the doorway.  

            He glanced to the girl, then back to the woman before him, who was eying him crazily with the knife held at the ready, as if daring him to make another attack. He held his hands up in concession and backed away a little, not wanting to provoke her into doing something hasty. Once he'd given her some distance, her body relaxed a little, her aggression flowing from her body to her harsh eyes and voice. 

            "Go, you brats!" she shouted. "Leave me alone! Don't you see I have nothing to live for? The least you could do is let me die in peace."

            "Don't say die!" Hari shouted in return. "Whatever your problems are, they can be solved Miss Won. We can help you, if you let us."

            "You can't help me," Erina hissed dangerously. "No-one can. Leave now, or I will not be held accountable for my actions." She held up her knife threateningly. "I'm warning you, I'll take another life if it means I can end my own. There are no prison sentences where I'm going."

            Hari's concerned eyebrows met. In this unstable state, she probably wouldn't hesitate to run him through. She looked like some berserk demon at the moment. Her eyes were red, with faraway pupils and her cheeks were darkened with dried tears. Little muscles all about her face were twitching wildly in the dance of madness. He would have to tread carefully with her, that was for sure. He glanced quickly to Ruri, who was still standing in the doorway, looking completely baffled by these sudden events. Hari wished she'd step in to help – he couldn't deal with this crazy woman all by himself. But he had to do his best, so here it went. With gentle words, he spoke again. 

            "What wrong, Miss Won?"

            "_What's wrong!? _Can't you see it for yourself!? Look at me!" she hollered. "Sitting here in a dark room all by myself while when everyone else is happily getting together with their family and friends, of which I have neither. Alone with my thoughts, I'm forced to confront the fact that I'm nothing more than a cruel, heartless bitch who thinks only of herself and has no value to anyone. And you ask me what is wrong. Well, here's the bottom line. _Everything is wrong. _Everything!"_ _

"Miss Won, please calm down," Ruri said, intervening for the first time. Her ghostly calm voice could have pacified a delirious bull. 

"Shut up, you monster!" 

Ruri's cool gaze didn't change or even waver. "Calm down, Miss Won," she repeated. "Anger won't get us anywhere."

To Hari's relief her words seemed to have some effect, with Erina's brow smoothing out as she relaxed a little. He took another step back to give her some breathing space, but remained poised to spring in case she took another slash at her wrists.

            "Please, Miss Won," Ruri continued, keeping the steady tone. "I want you to take three deep breaths and place that knife on the table."

            Amazingly she obeyed her. She snorted in amusement, as if mocking herself, then placed the knife gingerly on the table. Hari seized the opportunity. The moment Erina had withdrawn her hand, he made a grab for the knife.

"No! Hari, you idiot!" Ruri's startled cry came too late. No sooner had snatched up the blade than Erina had him in a vicious headlock. Being small for his age, Hari had little physical strength and Erina overpowered him easily. 

"Let go of it you brat! You won't decide my fate for me!"

"Hari! Leave it!" Ruri's tone was more than a little scolding. 

            "Urgh!" Resisting the instructions of his good sense, Hari relinquished possession of the knife. The dark-haired secretary greedily snatched it away and possessively clutched it to her chest, as if it was a favourite doll rather than an instrument of death. She stood tense like that for several seconds, regarding them guardedly, but when she realised that they wouldn't have another pop at depriving her of her precious knife, she loosened up again. Hari shot an imploring gaze to Ruri which asked her what their next course of action should be. She replied with a subtle circular gesture of her hand, which said, 'take it as it comes'. Swallowing, Hari nodded, praying that she was working on some kind of ingenious plan.  

Clearly feeling more comfortable with the situation than he was, Erina spoke, calmly now. "What are you doing here anyway?" she demanded gruffly. "Not carol singing I hope." There was no humour in her voice.

Clearing her throat, Ruri stood up straight with her arms behind her back. "Miss Won, Ruri Hoshino and family would like to request the pleasure of your company at our Christmas gathering." 

At first Erina gasped at that, clearly stunned by her invitation. The shock didn't last long though, for a second later her eyes narrowed to more familiar hostile slits. 

"You expect me to beg for your charity? No, I won't accept that!"

"Come on Miss Won," Hari pleaded. "What do you have to lose?"

Erina sniffed disdainfully. "My pride for one,"

"Indeed. The same foolish pride that brought you to the blade," Ruri stated, her quiet tone holding surprising force. "Humility is precious, Miss Won. You believe your life to be in tatters, but if you accept a helping hand from us, it can be the first steps in a new life. Your pride is a small price to pay for that."

"Yeah, she's absolutely right," Hari asserted. "Be happy now, for you'll be dead a long time," he quoted.

"Shut up! Just shut up!" Erina barked, her dark hair flailing around frenziedly as she shook her head at them. "You stupid kids don't know anything about my suffering! I refuse to celebrate Christmas with you! It's a horrid holiday, it means nothing to me except sorrow while others are happy!"

"It's wrong that you should see Christmas in such a way," Ruri said. "It's a very special occasion with a very important meaning, which I've only discovered for myself recently." She crouched down to level her face with Erina's demanding that her gaze meet her own.             

            "Last year, I was invited to a Christmas party by Mr Uribatake, but unfortunately, I and Jun were the only ones to attend it, so it didn't turn out to be as fun as he'd hoped. So while they spent the whole time drinking themselves stupid, I began to wonder what the real meaning behind Christmas was, for I was sure there was more to it then what I was seeing. I did some research in Omoikane's files and a little analysis at the time, but I still couldn't pin one down. But after thinking on it for a year, not to mention adding in my experiences from this past December, I recently came to a conclusion.Would you like to hear it?" 

"I don't care!" screamed Erina. 

"Well, I'm going to tell you anyway," Ruri murmured coolly. She strode over to the window and spoke with her back to her. Her voice was clear and precise, every word placed down like a carefully-placed jigsaw piece.   

"Christmas is not all about jolly Santas and mass consumerism," she started, looking out of the window into the winter wonderland beyond. "It's also not all about celebrating the birth of Christ. No. Those are only parts of the greater whole. Christmas is about so much more than them." She turned and levelled her gaze at both of them, making it clear that she was speaking as much to Hari as to Erina. "It's about building a snowman for no other reason than sharing the joy of creation with someone else. It's about singing songs that bring out happy feelings in people. It is about giving and receiving, and being delighted in both. And it's about skating on a frozen lake with your very best friend." She smiled over at Hari for that last one and he knew it had been meant for him.

"Overall, Christmas is a celebration of mankind's best traits. Love, generosity, forgiveness and being happy together with people you love. That is what Christmas is all about and if we forget that, then Christmas is meaningless." 

            She gave the sad secretary a smile and went on in a happier tone. "You are human too Miss Won, and you have those traits too, even if they are buried beneath some less admirable ones. You have the potential to partake in the joy that can be found in this season. You can be happy too."

"What a lovely uplifting speech," Erina said, snarling sarcastically through the tears. "But it's easy for you to say that, with your loving family Christmas to go home to. You can give Christmas whatever definition you like because you're going to enjoy it regardless. It won't mean anything to lonely ones like me!"  

            Ruri folded her lips in broodingly as she conceded this point. Just as Hari wondered whether she had an answer in her, she gave it, her voice lower now as she dealt with the darker side of the topic.

"No matter what we do, we cannot make everyone happy and there will always those who are miserable in the world. It is our duty as the more fortunate ones that we do not ignore them. We must spare them thoughts and to help them where we can. But we cannot let the misery of others totally deny us our happiness. If people cannot laugh while others are crying, then happiness in our world would not exist.

"The apathetic nature of reality ensures that we will never live in a perfect world. But if you ask me, Christmas is the closest we will ever get to that, so let us enjoy this festival of human happiness all we can. Christmas is a celebration of what is good in us, while New Year is an opportunity to renew ourselves by fixing those bad traits that we have. Take advantage of both Miss Won."

"Don't you get it?!" Erina screeched. "I'm beyond all that! I'm a lost cause. You saw how I was on the Nadesico. I'm nothing but evil. I have no goodness left to save." 

"Of course you do. Everyone has some goodness inside them. Likewise everyone has some badness in them as well. The relative balance between the two varies, but no-one is ever perfect, nor is anyone pure evil. There will always be some happiness amid the sorrow, some goodness amid the evil, some hope amid the despair. Among all the darkness some light will remain," With that, she smiled and picked up a fat white candle dotted with glistening blue stars that was resting on the windowsill. She held it high and examined it, her eyes alight like the flickering flame in her hand. "Yes, light amongst darkness. Like candles in gloom."

"I don't have any such light," Erina murmured miserably. "I don't have any good points at all."  

"Yes you do," said Ruri, "For example, you're intelligent."

"You're pretty," Hari added. 

"You're resolute," said Ruri.

"You're hard working," said Hari.

"And you have a compassionate streak within you that rarely gets the chance to come out and play," Ruri breathed in conclusion. "Let it out Miss Won. That's what it's alls about – letting the goodness inside you come out while suppressing the badness. Live through your good points, not through your flaws, Miss Won," Ruri said, placing the candle before her on the coffee table. "It's the only way to live life properly. Do that and you'll be happy, I promise you."

            Erina said nothing, just sat with her head bowed and her fingers slowly squirming together as Ruri's deep words showered down on her like a cleansing rain. Her hair obscured her face now, making her look like a scolded schoolgirl, ashamed of looking her teacher directly in the eye. There was defeat in her demeanour, and yet ironically that defeat held triumph, for she now seemed to be on the first step to recovery. Something inexplicable about her posture told Hari that she wouldn't be drawing her own blood today, or anytime soon. 

_"My God, Ruri's done it. She's actually gotten through to her. Damn, she's incredible!"_

Erina was shaking now, her eyes preparing fresh tears. "Why did you come to save me?" she asked, uncharacteristically timidly. 

            Ruri closed her eyes and bowed her head solemnly. "Because we're good people. And you are a friend."

            Erina emitted a small sob at that and new tears spilled forth. The pale girl opposite her approached and placed her slender arms around her. It was clear that Erina had been yearning for a hug like this for a long time, by the way she accepted it and clutched hungrily onto Ruri, like a child to a mother, except in this case the mother actually was a child.   

            "It's okay," Ruri murmured, though the words sounded strange in her vacant tone. "It's all going to be okay now. We're going to take care of you and set you right."

            "Okay," Erina replied in a tiny voice.

"And you're coming back home with us, aren't you?" It wasn't a question that Ruri spoke. 

            "Yes. I'll come with you," she peeped tearfully. 

            "Great!" said Hari, sensing it was finally safe for him to speak. "Then there's no time to waste. Let's go!"

            "We have plenty of time," Ruri said, drawing back so she could face the woman in her arms. "Miss Won, why don't you freshen up first? If you have a shower and a change of clothes you will feel much better." 

            "Yes," Erina muttered, smearing her hands over her tear-stained cheeks. 

            "Go on," Ruri soothingly ushered her to the bathroom. Erina went in, closing the door behind her. Hari winced as he heard the _click_ of the lock. 

            "Are you sure it's okay to leave her in bathroom alone?" he asked. "She probably has blades in there you know,"

"It'll be fine," Ruri replied neutrally. 

"How do you know that?"

Ruri's face suddenly became sunny smile, seemingly out of place in this situation. "Because, as strange as it sounds coming from me, I trust her. We had to strike deep, but I believe we've severed the root of her despair. A little moment alone will give her a chance to put her thoughts in some kind of order." 

            "Okay," Hari replied, deciding to trust her conviction. "Urm, look, I'm sorry I nearly messed everything up, Ruri."

"Don't be. You were acting in what you thought were her best interests, so you shouldn't apologise. And we won in the end," she turned to him solemnly. "But I hope you realise now that this was a fight we weren't going to win by force,"

"Yeah," Hari agreed. And it was true. They could deprive Erina of any method of suicide, but without killing the suicidal urges within her, they would never have gained victory.   

            Just then he remembered something else.

            "Hey, Ruri. What you just said to her. What Christmas means…"

            "That Christmas is about the goodness in people? Yes, that is what I believe and the answer I wanted you to find." She smiled again. "But you were close enough so I will let you have the point!"

            "Er, thanks," he replied, even as he considered the words that she'd spoken. 

            _"Christmas is a celebration of what is good in us," _he repeated in his mind. _"It's a chance to celebrate our good traits no matter which bad ones we have." His gaze went down to the fat candle which Ruri had placed on the low coffee table. __"Light amongst darkness. Like candles in gloom."_

*          *          *

            Erina took her time getting ready and it was a full half hour before she emerged, wearing a pink blouse and a black skirt. Though Ruri seemed relaxed enough, Hari had been fretting the whole time. He couldn't stop the paranoid visions of forcing the bathroom door open to find the woman, who had been living and talking to him just a moment ago, lying dead in a pool of her own blood. Fortunately, his fears had turned out to be unfounded and when Erina was finally all set to go, she looked far, far better than she had when they'd first found her. Make-up, soap and clean clothes had taken away all traces of the distress she had been in, and now she looked like a normal woman again. And yet, there was still a certain lack of confidence in her air and expression which told of the emotional turmoil that was writhing around in her head. She hadn't made a full recovery yet, but progress had been made and they had to be content with that for now.  

            "Well then," murmured Ruri. "Shall we go?"

The unlikely trio left the apartment, one child on each of the woman's hands. Now they had a short walk and a train ride before they returned to the safe shores of Ruri's place. Hari just hoped nothing else would go wrong before they could get there. 

**A/N – I'm not sure exactly where the "Be happy now, for you'll be dead a long time," quote came from. I think it's Chinese. Please feel free to enlighten me if you know better. **

**Two chapters to go. The next one's kind of short, while the final one will deal with Christmas Day itself. Is Erina truly saved? Will Ruri and Hari ever be more than just friends? And how is everyone else doing, having been absent for two whole chapters now?! Tune in next time to find out!**


	7. Wolf at the Door

**Chapter 6 – Wolf at the Door **

_9:23 pm__, __24th December 2198___

            The return journey took far longer than the initial one, with numerous delays including one which had kept the train stationary for a whole half-hour. Thankfully they'd had seats the whole way this time which had made the trip much more comfortable. Ruri had spent most of the trip asleep on Hari's shoulder while Erina, sitting opposite them, had just sat there silently with her arms contemplatively folded. Hari wasn't sure what she was thinking, but the sporadic conversation they'd had on the way reassured him that she hadn't reverted to her suicidal state just yet. 

It was quarter past nine by the time they eventually reached the village. They had disembarked into the cold winter evening and were now heading for home. The wind tore harshly at their bare cheeks and the air was fluffy with falling snow, but they pressed on relentlessly, their coats clutched around them and their eyes squinted against the wintry weather. Despite the conditions it seemed like they were home and dry. At least until Erina suddenly stopped dead, fifty feet from the house. 

"Miss Won?" Hari inquired, puzzled. 

She shook her head in defiance. "No. I won't go in until they invite me."

"What do you mean?" Hari asked. "We've already invited you."

"I don't mean you," Erina said coldly. "I was talking about _them_." She motioned at the house with her head to make it clear for him. 

"What?" Hari exclaimed. "But you've come all this way! You can't back out now, there's no…"

"Hari, come on," Ruri said, touching his shoulder as she walked past him towards the house. He gasped as she continued on away from them, not even looking back. With a quick apologetic glance to Erina, he ran to catch up with her.

            "Hey! Ruri, what are you doing?" he demanded. "We can't let her back out now!"

She answered without looking at him. "Don't worry, she's not going anywhere. This is just a measure to spare her pride further damage. Think of it as a formality."

            "I don't get it! What do you mean? Why are you leaving her out here in the snow?"

            "Trust me Hari," she stated, not smiling. Before he could answer, she strode up to her front door and yanked it open with a force which told him that he had to, whether he understood it or not. Sighing, he followed her inside deciding to see how this padded out. 

            Ruri paused in the doorway, scraping the snow off her feet before allowing Hari in to do the same. No sooner had the door closed behind them then they heard Minato's teasing voice from the kitchen.

"Well, it looks as though the princess and her knight have finally returned!"

A second later  Yurika lunged out of the kitchen in their direction, her whole body quivering with relief as she darted over to embrace her daughter. "Where have you two _been?" she screeched hysterically. "We've been so worried, I was on the verge of sending out a search party you know!"_

"I'm sorry Mother," Ruri replied blandly. "But we went to fetch a guest."

"Hmm?" she drew back curiously, normal service instantly restored in her demeanour. "A guest? Who's that Ruri dear?"

"A friend in an enemy who desperately needs our help," Ruri replied cryptically, walking into the kitchen with her mother and Hari in perplexed tow. Everyone was sitting around the table finishing a meal of pasta that Akito had whipped up and every pair of eyes shot in their direction as they entered. Akito and Minato looked at them with relief, Jun and Megumi, with greeting and Yukina and Mikoto with accusation. 

"Hiya Ruri!" Megumi chirped cheerfully. "Merry Christmas."

Ruri was as freakishly composed as ever. "Hello Miss Reinard, Mr Aoi. I apologise for my lateness. And Mother, Father, I am sorry for making you worry." 

"Ruri, what about the guest you were talking about? I didn't see anyone else with you," Yurika said, shiny eyes bulging as they demanded an answer from her.  

            The pale girl turned to face her parents. As neutral as her face was, her words were saturated with feeling. "Mother, Father, it is time for some seasonal forgiveness."

            "Ruri, you're not making any sense!" Akito exclaimed. "What are you talking about? Who is this person?"

Ruri nonchalantly gestured with her arm. "Take a look out of the kitchen window."

In a frenzy of pushing back chairs, everyone upped and dashed over to see what Ruri wanted to show them. The visibility was poor with all the falling snow but by squinting they could just make out the figure, standing alone in the midst of winter.  Akito recognised her first and cried out. "Hey, that's Erina!"

            "Erina? Are you sure?!" Yurika yelled incredulously. "My goodness, it _is_ her! Oh Ruri, don't let her freeze out there! Go and bring her in! Akito, put the kettle on, she'll want a cup of tea!"

            "Hold the phone! You're inviting Erina in here? Even after all the mean things she's done?" Yukina demanded hotly. The image of her trying to manipulate Akito with knowledge of his parents was clearly still fresh in her mind. 

"The Tenkawa Christmas party excludes no-one," Akito announced. "Especially not a lonely woman who turns up on our doorstep on Christmas Eve." 

            "That's right," said Ruri quietly 

Despite having instructing her daughter to do so, Yurika had run to the front door first and flung it wide. "Erina!" she called from the doorway, waving her hand at her. "Erina, come on in!"

            The dark figure in the snow turned to regard her and then, with slow dignity, she started towards the house. Her face and eyes were strangely vacant as she came, almost like Ruri's were, Hari noted. As she came up the steps to them, Yurika clasped her shoulder with her left hand and Erina's hand with her right. 

            "Welcome to our home Erina! Please come on in and warm yourself up!"

            "Hello Yurika," Erina replied, flatly and almost inaudibly. "Thank you for welcoming me. I won't trouble you long."

"Nonsense!" chirped Yurika. "You can stay, it's Christmas! We'll set you up with Minato in Ruri's room! Now come on, let's get something hot in you!"

            "…okay," Erina said, clearly stunned by this munificent display of hospitality. She stepped over the threshold, out of the cold darkness outside and into the warm welcoming arms of the Tenkawa household. As she crossed into the hall, Hari gave himself a secret fist of triumph.

_"She's in! __Mission__ accomplished!"_

The raven-haired woman followed a beaming Yurika into the kitchen and was met with a chorus of greeting. _"Hi Erina!" everyone said in jolly unison, coming over to welcome her. Minato gave her an affectionate hug, Jun and Megumi shook her hand and even Yukina and Mikoto added their personal greetings, in the form of a 'hi' and a nod. Akito was last up, and took her hand in his own with surprising tenderness._

            "Welcome to our Christmas bash Erina!"

            "Thank you," Erina replied, seemingly too overwhelmed to say any more. Hari knew that never in her most far-fetched dreams would she had expected a welcome like this. His sharp vision detected an ever so slight shimmer in her brown eyes, betraying the joyful tears amassing there. He smiled at that, altogether very pleased with the way this was turning out. 

            As the newcomer was being besieged by first greetings, and then Minato's relentless conversation, Yurika sidled over to the two children who had brought her here.

            "So that's what you two were doing all this time?" she whispered.  "Going all that way to get her?"

            "Yes," Ruri replied. "We figured she would be lonely and needed somewhere to spend Christmas. Isn't that right Hari?"  

            "Ah-huh."

            "You did that for her? Oh, you two!"  She flung herself at them and caught them both in a hug, one in each arm. "That's so considerate of you! Oh, you're both such wonderful children!" She squeezed them both tightly, with a windpipe-crushing grip. "I'm _so proud of you!" _

            "Er, thank you, Miss Misumaru," Hari stammered, struggling for breath. 

            "You deserve some credit Mother," Ruri said, speaking into her shoulder. "After all, whatever consideration I have shown today was put there by you."

            "Oh Ruri, Ruri!" Yurika kissed lovingly her forehead. "My lovely little girl!"

*          *          *

            She shook hand after hand, received hug after hug. It was unbelievable, this warm reception she'd been given. She'd been nothing but nasty to them throughout the whole Lizards War, and yet here they were, not only taking her in, but happy to do so as well? It delighted and baffled her in equal measure.  

_"This is the kind of thing Ruri was talking about. If I can learn to show and accept goodness like this, then there is hope for me yet. I can find something worth celebrating Christmas for."_

No sooner had the greetings finished than she found a steaming cup of tea and a mince pie thrust into her hands. A seat was put under her and in next to no time she was being questioned about how she was and what she'd been up to. The answers to the questions were painful for the most part, but the questions themselves were bliss. To have people curious about her life and genuinely concerned about her wellbeing was such a heartening feeling and one she hadn't experienced for such a long time. Erina couldn't help but smile and laugh as her confidence soared once again. 

_"Yes, this is the goodness I am seeking. Starting now, I will change my ways and light candles of my own, to shine forth and obliterate the darkness the surrounds me."_

            She gave herself a secret smirk. It certainly looked as though this Christmas coming would be far more enjoyable than the one she'd had originally planned. 

**A/N – Final chapter coming tomorrow!**


	8. Merry Christmas Miss Won

**Chapter 7 – Merry Christmas Miss Won**

_Christmas Day_

            "Wake up, wake up! Damn you Hari, get your ass in gear!"

            With a groan, Hari stirred and squinted at his watch through painful blurry vision. "Mik, it's six-fifteen,"

            "Yeah, but it's _Christmas!" Mikoto shouted, way too loudly. She persisted in shaking him like a rattle. "Come on you lazy-bones! We've gotta go wake the grown-ups!" ___

            "Urgh," Hari rubbed his eyes, burning in demand for more sleep. Grunting, he sat up, knowing Mikoto's pestering wouldn't cease until he did. Next to him he saw Yukina applying similar treatment to a reluctant Ruri, whose bloodshot eyes looked like a sunset now, with pale red surrounding a central golden globe. Unfortunately, she didn't seem to be currently embracing the warmth that would suggest. Her fixed frown and sagging cheeks told him that she was not exactly thrilled at being woken up this early and would quite like a few more hours sleep, thank you very much.  

"Come on, let's get the others!" Yukina cried excitedly, completely ignoring the lethargic stares they were giving her. 

"You go ahead, we'll join you in a second," Hari slurred, drunk with drowsiness. 

"'kay, but you'd better still be awake when we get back!" Yukina said. "Come on, Mik, let's go and jump on Minato's bed!" 

"Yeah!" The two girls whooshed up the stairs, both of them way too energetic for this ungodly hour. Hari spared a thought of pity for the unsuspecting adults, but was glad for a second's peace. In the meantime he was left alone with Ruri who smiled sleepily at him from behind many tresses of dishevelled white hair. 

"Merry Christmas Hari."

"Merry Christmas to you too Ruri," said Hari, leaning in to give her a hug. She returned it warmly, and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Wow," she said, still embracing him. "Look under the tree. There are many more gifts than there were last night!" 

Turning his head, Hari looked. "You're right! Sheesh, there're millions of them!" 

Both of them crawled over fascinated and began to investigate, picking up and examining the presents under the tree. They were all shapes, sizes and colours, a magical pile of colour and generosity. Some were obviously CDs or DVDs and some were a sure-bet to be books, but there were others with such odd shapes that it was impossible to even imagine what they could be. The most interesting one of all though was a colossal one behind the tree against the wall. It was the largest gift of all, with the area of a kitchen table.  

"It's for you Ruri!" Hari shouted excitedly. "It's from your Mum and Dad!"

"Such a large gift? For me?" Ruri seemed overwhelmed. "Those idiots…"

"Oh that reminds me!" Hari darted back over to his suitcase, which had been tidily slotted at the foot of his sleeping bag. 

"What?" Ruri asked.

"I brought presents too. Here," he returned with a plastic bag, filled with shoddily wrapped presents. None of them were that large, but there were plenty of them so that they were nearly spilling out of the carrier bag. He knelt by the tree and started adding them to the massive pile, carefully finding a spot for each one. 

"You bought presents for everyone?" Ruri gasped, dumbfounded. 

"Of course I did!"

"But you didn't have to do that! You are guest and a child after all. You must have saved up for ages to have been able to afford all this!"

"Well, yeah. But I guess I felt I had to do it." Hari said, scratching the back of his head. "After all, you said Christmas was about the good in people, right? And part of that is giving isn't it?"

Shaking her head in fond exasperation, Ruri sighed. "Idiot."

"Heh," Hari replied, reaching down into his bag to retrieve the final gift. "Oh hey, this one's for you!"

"You have one for me?" she stammered, gingerly taking the small parcel off him. "Oh Hari, you shouldn't have!"

"Of course I got one for you! You're my very best friend after all. Yours was the first one I bought!" 

"Heart bigger than your mind," she murmured, repeating the words she'd said on the train earlier. "But that's what I like best about you," she moved in and hugged him again. Hari placed his own arms around her and squeezed her, savouring the heat of her body against his own. 

As harsh fate had it, this moment of bliss was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell. It made them start in each others arms and look over to the front door in surprise. Reluctantly, Hari released her so she could answer it. "Who would it be this early?" Ruri wondered aloud as she went. 

Taking the key from its hook, she unlocked and opened the door. Hari shivered as cold air rushed inside, but didn't let it stop him from moving closer to see who it was, over Ruri's shoulder. On the doorstep, a young athletic woman with bright green hair stood, stifling a yawn with a hand. She looked familiar, but Hari couldn't place her. Fortunately, Ruri could. 

"Merry Christmas Miss Subaru!" she said brightly. "Please come in. You certainly are early."

"Yeah, I got an early train," said Ryoko, wiping the sleep out of her eyes. "A _very_ early train. The one I was planning to take got cancelled, so I took that one instead. Wasn't expecting anyone to be awake this early, but I heard noises so I figured I'd try the bell," She strode into the room, stretching her arms and yawning lazily. "Is everyone up yet?"

"Well, they certainly will be very soon," Hari murmured, looking over towards the stairs, up which the two girls had dashed. 

            "Well then, what are we waiting for!?" the green-haired Aesiti pilot demanded, thrusting a fist into the air. "Let's get Christmas started!"

*          *          *

            They came with mixed feelings. There was bound to be some happiness to come with Christmas morning, but the hour was far too small for everyone to be feeling it whole-heartedly. Every adult looked sleepy and tousled by the early morning, with the exception of Minato who was as pretty and cheery as ever, without a hair out of place. Akito and Yurika, however, were still awake enough to seek out their daughter and give her a very warm Merry Christmas hug. Hari felt a little pang of envy, seeing that family love which he would never know right there in front of him, but he dismissed it quickly. Christmas was not the time for such unhappy thoughts! 

The great gift bonanza began. Yukina and Mikoto had quickly designated themselves as the official 'present-giver-outers', taking random gifts from under the tree to their recipients sitting all over the room. It was a role perfectly suited to them considering that both of them had more energy than the rest of the room combined at the moment. Soon everyone had a present on their lap and the unwrapping commenced. 

Between them, Yurika, Akito and Minato had decided, way back in October, how they were going to organise the children's presents. Each one would get a 'main' present, something expensive and substantial. But in addition to that they would also get a small stocking which was filled with such things as selection boxes, T-shirts, quirky little gadgets and, in Mikoto's case, a charming pair of bright pink toe-socks which she insisted on showing off to everybody. 

One would have put good odds on Ruri's main present being computer-related, but to everyone's surprise it was nothing of the sort. Instead, the largest gift of them all had turned out to be a small, baby-blue bike with its own bell and basket. Her gleaming jewel-like eyes lit up in delight the moment she saw it, and she'd flung herself into the arms of her parents a second later. Yukina had done the exact same to Minato when she'd uncovered her brand new hi-fi. And Mikoto, bless her, had actually burst into tears when she'd unwrapped her present – her very own _Gamebase_ computer console, with six games and an extra controller.  

Hari himself had also done exceptional well, gift-wise. He'd received an eight-ball, a few selection boxes, a CD of classical music, a shoot 'em up for his computer, a model kit, a signed copy of the recently published_ My Lizard War Story by Jun Aoi and a metal colander (which had been from Izumi, predictably enough). His main gift though had been a tiny silver digital video camera which he'd been absolutely thrilled to receive. Yurika had explained, saying that he'd be able to send videos of himself speaking along with his e-mails to Ruri, rather than just plain old words. Hari loved both the gift and the thought behind it and had expressed his gratitude so profusely that he had looked like a chicken pecking in the dust when he bowed to them. _

Erina didn't have presents for everyone of course, but gave each child an envelope with a cheque in it, much to their delight. One nice surprise was that Jun and Megumi actually had a present for _her. They'd been planning to drop it off on Boxing Day, during a tour of former Nadesico crew-members who lived there, so it was actually very convenient that they could give it to her now. She'd been flattered and tore it open eagerly. It had only been a bottle of red wine, but she appreciated the gesture none the less. _

By mid-morning all presents had been exchanged and they found themselves drowning in a sea of wrapping-paper, ribbon and gift tags. After the waste-paper had been cleared up and the selection boxes soundly raided, Yurika had suggested to the kids that they get dressed while she conjured up some sausage sandwiches. 

            Despite being the last in the bathroom (and hence the unfortunate one to get the cold shower) Hari was the first to be dressed, wearing the one smart shirt that he owned, which was a fairly chic faded orange colour, and a pair of musical Christmas socks which he'd found in his stocking (which he'd seen as quite impractical. He'd only be able to wear them once a year!). He waited at the bottom of the stairs for the girls to descend, setting up his new gizmo, which was frustratingly fiddly to work out even for a tech-head like himself. In fact he still hadn't figured it out by the time they finally came down. Ruri looked very pretty indeed in her smart blue dress with frills everywhere. For today, she had replaced the bobbled headbands that usually held her hair in place with little patches of shiny blue tinsel. The other two girls were also neatly dressed-up, but the fake red antlers which they both wore kind of spoiled the effect.  

About then, Yurika brought their sandwiches out, leaving the kitchen free so Akito, along with his beautiful assistant Minato, could start work on their epic Christmas dinner. Things quietened down for a little bit as they brunched, then went on to muck around for their presents. A video game tournament began on Mikoto's new console, involving all the kids plus Ryoko, while Jun studied a book he'd been given and Yurika chatted with Megumi (their conversation seemed to revolve around them bragging about their respective boyfriends, typical of the competitiveness that had always existed between them). The pleasant period of stillness lasted for an hour before, at midday on the dot, the excitement began again at the unexpected sound of the doorbell.

 "Goodness, I wonder who that is," said Yurika, coming to get it. Hari paused the game and everyone watched curiously as Yurika opened the door. 

On their doorstep stood four familiar figures, all wearing Santa hats. A slender man with floppy black hair, a tall blonde woman with hands in pockets, a moustached chap whose glasses were misting up with in the heat coming from the room and a massive hulk of a man towering over them from behind. Just as everyone had recognised them, Nagure Akatsuki, Inez Fressange, Prospector and, yes, even Goat Hoary burst out into song. 

_"We wish you a Merry Christmas,_

_We wish you a Merry Christmas,_

_We wish you a Merry Christmas,_

_And a Happy New Year!"_

_"Good tidings we bring,_

_To you and your kin,_

_We wish you a Merry Christmas,_

_And a Happy New Year!"_

"Right that's your lot," said Akatsuki once they were done. "Now make with the figgy pudding already!"

"Mr Akatsuki? Everyone?" Yurika gasped. "What are you all doing here?"

"We come bearing Christmas cheer," Prospector announced. "Along with a case of wine and an apple pie, courtesy of Miss Fressange! Not to mention plenty of gifts for everybody!" He indicated the colossal sack that Goat had slung over his shoulder.

"So may we come in?" Miss Fressange asked. "Only it's very cold out here on your doorstep."

"Oh, of course!" said Yurika stepping aside. "Come in, give me your coats!"

The four of them trotted in, one by one. Goat hit his head on the doorframe, sending Yukina and Mikoto into hysterics. After shedding his black leather jacket, Akatsuki scanned the room and when he saw Erina, his grin outgrew his face. "Ah-ha! So she _is_ here after all! Merry Christmas, my darling Erina!" He walked over and embraced her.

"Why are you are?" Erina stuttered, looking daunted as she accepted his arms. "I though you were working today."

"Well, that was the plan," Akatsuki said. "And to be fair to us, we had a go, but by nine o'clock we'd all decided we'd had enough. The first plan was to pay a festive visit to our very own flower of Nergal here." He gestured musically at Erina.

"Me?" Erina blurted incredulously. 

"Yep, but we didn't find you at your apartment. We were at a bit of a loose end after that but then ever-bright Miss Fressange here did a little investigation and found out that you'd used your Nergal transport pass to come to this village." He smiled, baring gleaming white teeth. "Knowing that, it didn't take a Ruri to work out where you'd gone to!"

"You came all this way because you wanted to spend Christmas with me?!" Erina said again, not believing the words she spoke. 

"Why, of course Erina," Akatsuki replied slyly. "My favourite holiday wouldn't be the same without my number one girl now, would it?"

Hari grinned up at her and gave her a nudge. "There you go!" he whispered. "And you thought that no-one cared for you!"

            Erina gave no sign of having heard him. Her whole body was quivering now and her face was crinkling up with emotion. In that very moment, her depression was finally defeated for good for if she needed any more evidence that people cared for her it was right here in front of her. "Oh…oh damn," With a sob she turned away, one hand on covering her mouth as the tears fell forth from her eyes. 

            Akatsuki approached her, clearly a little surprised at this emotional reaction from her. "Come now, today is not for tears!" he said, taking her in his arms again. She hugged him back fiercely, her salty tears absorbed by his shoulder as she stuffed her face into it. Everyone sighed contentedly at the touching scene (except for Yukina, who rather inappropriately yelled 'get a room!').

"Anyway, now that we've finally tracked you down, let the gifting commence!" Prospector announced eagerly. 

"All the presents are in here," Goat murmured with typical gruffness, as she slung the sack onto the floor. "Come and I will give them out."

"Hope we don't have to sit on your lap to get them," Mikoto murmured. 

"Here we go!" said Prospector, fishing gifts out of the bag and distributing them, seemingly at random. "One for our gorgeous captain, one for Megumi, one for Ryoko. And here's one for you Hari!"

            "Even for me?" Hari unwrapped his gift. It was a travel alarm clock with the Nergal logo on the face. 

"What did you get Ruri?"

            "A Nergal T-shirt," Ruri replied, holding it up against herself. "As if I didn't already have enough of these." 

            "Count yourself lucky!" Mikoto spat. "I got the Nergal golf-ball! I don't even _like_ golf!" 

            "And everyone else?" Hari asked. 

"Nergal keychain," said Jun.

"A Nergal tie," said Akito. 

"I got a Nergal bath-pillow," Yukina added gloomily. "Anyone wanna trade?"

            "I'll swap," said Yurika. "I got a Nergal baseball cap!"

            "Nergal beach-towel?" Ryoko murmured, examining it at arms-length with disgust. "Great."

"Well, I got Nergal smelling salts," said Megumi. "Now that's a product too far."           

            "And I got a Nergal stress ball," Minato concluded. "Now all I need is some stress!"

            "Mr Akatsuki, is there anything in that sack that isn't Nergal branded?" Yukina asked bitterly. 

            "There is indeed, but it all belongs to our very own Miss Won," replied Akatsuki, with a slight bow. Goat dumped the sack, which was still half-full, and all the remaining packages at Erina's feet.

            "They're all for me?"

            "Sure are. Think of it as a combination of a Christmas present, a token of friendship, a reward for good work this year and a thank-you for keeping me sane during the whole Lizards War. Add in presents from Prospector, Inez and Goat and you get half a sack of pressies! Aren't you the lucky ducky?"

            "Oh you shouldn't have, Mr Chairman…"

            "I wanted to, you whole-heartedly deserve them! Merry Christmas Miss Won!"

            "Merry Christmas to you too, Nagure," she replied, her eyes twinkling with happiness foreign to them. 

Deciding she could finally come in, Yurika spoke, addressing the four newcomers. "Um, now that you're here, why don't you stay for Christmas dinner?" she offered. "After all, we've got enough food to feed the whole Nadesico and then some!"

Akatsuki put on an expression of fake confusion. "I'd assumed that was a given. Far be it from me to come all the way out here without seeing what the fanboy cooks up for a Christmas meal. But we'd be delighted!"

*          *          *

Akito Tenkawa was an excellent cook. But with this Christmas dinner, he had set himself a new standard. The turkey was tender and juicy, the roast potatoes were crispy, the sausages plump and wrapped in crunchy bacon, the Yorkshire puddings were warm and spongy, the cauliflower cheese was bubbling hot and the carrots nice and crunchy. Unfortunately the sprouts were still repulsive. Not even Akito's talents could make them taste good. 

There was plenty for everyone, even with the extra guests there was still enough left over to ensure turkey sandwiches for lunch until the New Year. The table had been set out in a 'T' formation, with the children at one end and the hosts at the other. To Hari's delight, Ruri had practically barged her way through the others in order to knick the seat next to him. 

            As Akito and Minato dished the food up, everyone pulled their crackers. Hari and Ruri pulled each others, and while Hari won the first time, he deliberately lost the second, so she could have a hat. Predictably, he ended up with the tacky bracelet in his, but Yukina had kindly traded her 'Snakes-and-Ladders' game for it. There was also much laughter when Mikoto pulled a cracker with Goat and won convincingly. But there was less amusement from the dreadful cracker jokes.  

"Hey, this is a good one," Akito announced. "What has an E at the beginning, an E at the end, but only one letter?"

"I don't know Akito," Yurika replied. "What _does have an E at the beginning, an E at the end, but only one letter?"___

Mercilessly, Akito delivered the dire punch-line. "An envelope!" 

Silence descended on the table. You could almost see the tumbleweed drifting past. Yukina threw a mince-pie in his direction and no-one denied that he had deserved it. 

            They'd dug in to the meal with relish, not out of hunger, but because the food tasted _so good that eating it slowly just seemed silly. Everyone, without exception, commented on how good it was. Megumi described it as 'divine', Mikoto said it was 'yummy-licious' and Akatsuki had gone so far as to call it 'orgasmic'. For his part, Hari adored the crunchy roast potatoes and had kept going back for more until they'd all gone. After second helpings for everyone, and thirds for some, everyone was stuffed to bursting with fine food, but that didn't stop them from polishing off Miss Fressange's apple pie, with a dash of custard. _

*          *          *

            Everyone, bar Megumi on the keyboard, went silent to let Ruri's angelic voice do its thing.

_            "Once in royal David's city,_

_            Stood a lonely cattle-shed,_

_            Where a mother laid her baby,_

_            In a manger for his bed,_

_            Mary was that mother mild!_

_            Jesus Christ, her little child."_

            On cue, everyone else joined in for the second verse, which sounded a whole lot rougher than it had with just the soloist, mainly due to the addition of Goat Hoary to the vocals. Akatsuki had surprised everyone with a melodic voice that, frankly put all the other males to shame, while Megumi and Minato sung as beautifully as you would expect them to, and Yukina and Mikoto tried to get away with just mouthing the lyrics.   

            Together they sung the remaining verses and when they were done, Yurika started clapping jubilantly. 

            "That was fantastic, people!"

            "And Ruri, you were wonderful!" added Minato.

            "…thank you," murmured Ruri, ducking her head timidly. Hari, standing next to her, squeezed her hand happily.

            "You really were," he murmured to her alone. She smiled shyly at him in return,  

            "Right, from the top people!" said Megumi, striking a few tuneful keys. "Let's hit it with _O come all ye faithful! Three, two, one…"_

            _"O come all ye faithful…!"_

*          *          *

            The post-Christmas dinner lull took place once their lungs were all burnt out. Everybody lay about sleepily, engaging in their own little conversations about the room. Yukina and Mikoto returned to their video games while Ryoko of all people was talking with Erina. Astoundingly, the green-haired pilot had actually seemed glad that Erina and the rest of the Nergal brigade had turned up – it had made her less of an intruder to the Christmas gathering.   

            Hari himself was slouched on the sofa, Ruri next to him. Neither had the energy to do anything besides loafing.

            "Do you want to play on the console again?" Hari asked. 

            "No thank you. I've played enough video games today to last me for the rest of my life."

            "Then what do you want to do?"

            Ruri stretched out with a lazy yawn. "Not a whole lot at the moment."

            As the pair sat stewing in their own sleepiness, Jun came up to them, beer in one hand and half-eaten mince-pie in the other. "How are you two doing then?" he asked, spraying crumbs over them. 

"Little tired but otherwise just fine, thank you Mr Aoi," Hari replied, suppressing a belch.

"That's great!" Jun said cheerily. "Hey Ruri, don't you think this party's way more fun than the one we were at last year!?"

Ruri grinned up at him. "I agree, but don't let Mr Uribatake hear you say that!"

"Hey, it's the facts! You, Yurika and Akito did a wonderful job!"

"It took everyone here to make this day what it was, Mr Aoi,"

"That it did!" he laughed. "What a great day it's been!" he raised his beer-glass, sloshing liquid over the rim and making Hari wonder just how much he'd had to drink. Just then, Megumi sidled up beside them and reclaimed her man, kissing him and drawing him away to join Erina and Ryoko's conversation. Hari watched the group and in particular Erina, who was talking and laughing with them as if they'd been life-long friends. She looked happy and comfortable with them and wasn't at all afraid to speak up. It was as if all her past wrongs had never happened and she'd just been another war comrade on the Nadesico. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Ruri watching her too. She smiled and nodded in her direction.

"Look how happy she is. You did a good thing for her Hari."

"Huh?" Hari blurted incredulously. "Wait a second, why are you giving me the credit?! It was you who convinced her not to top herself. You're the one who saved the day, I was just tagging along."

"That's not true. It was your idea to go in the first place," she reminded him gently. 

"Well, that wasn't anything really…" Hari muttered.

"You shouldn't be so modest, you know," she added with a smile. "For you have very little to be modest about." 

Hari dipped his head shyly. "Well…I don't know about that."

Ruri's smiled widened. "You're lovely," she said, touching his face affectionately. "You are my star."

Hari flushed red at the feel of those icy, yet soft, fingertips against his cheek. Combined with her glorious golden gaze, this contact left him transfixed and gaping like a loony. The girl beamed at him with brightness atypical to her normal self, and even let a girlish giggle slip. 

_"Oh Ruri, Ruri," _he said in his mind._ "God, I love you."_

Just then, he was distracted by the sound of Miss Minato clearing her throat. The tall woman had snuck up behind them and now held something above them that made Hari's heart stop. 

"Why look, it's the mistletoe!" she giggled with a mischievous grin. "You two know what to do!"

Wild panic flashed through Hari. Kissing Ruri would be a dream come true, but his foremost thoughts were worried for her dignity. To kiss her would embarrass, and most likely disgust her, but to not would offend her, perhaps making her believe that he didn't like her. He blushed furious, wishing he could bosun-jump out of this awkward situation. Everyone was looking at them – he had to do _something_.

He tried pathetic words. "Er, well, we don't have to do…"

At that point he was cut off. No way he could talk with Ruri's lips pressed so insistently against his own. 

It was happening. For a mad moment, all his mind knew was unchecked paradise. At a glance, it was so easy to think of Ruri as some kind of cold ice princess, but up close she was nothing of the sort. Her lips felt like warm velvet against his own, so soft and full of passion. 

And then all too soon they parted. Hari couldn't speak, only try to comprehend how his most precious dream had come true so suddenly. He stared at her madly, imploring her to say something. The girl's cheeks were blazing red and those wonderful eyes of hers were hidden shyly behind her fringe.

"Sorry, I…just," she stammered in a rare loss for words. "It's just that…" She collected herself with a swallow and looked up again, staring deeply into his eyes. "Isn't that what you're supposed to do to someone you love?" It was a genuine question and her shiny eyes confirmed it. 

Seeing that look on her pretty face finally put words in his mouth. "Yeah it is. And also to someone who loves you back," he replied. Suddenly filled with a confidence he'd never felt before, he leaned in to kiss her again. This second kiss was more fluent, as this time he was able to prepare for it. He was able to kiss her back, channelling all his affection for her into the motion of their lips.  

Everyone else had watched this exchange in silent amazement. But now, Minato started clapping, Megumi joined her and soon the whole room was applauding them. Well, except for a certain purple-haired girl, who was glaring at them jealously, and a certain redhead, who thought the whole thing very silly.  

            "How cruel fate is," Mikoto groaned dramatically. "To take away my first love on Christmas Day."

"Oh grow up!" Yukina muttered, giving her a light clout on the head. "You've only known him for two days. Quit being such a drama queen!"

"Guess I'll learn move on in time," Mikoto added, ignoring her. "Hey is that cute tall guy with dark hair married?" she asked. 

"Akatsuki?" laughed Yukina. "No, but…"

"Then it's settled! Come New Year, I'm a girl with a mission!" she announced, excitedly slapping her hands together. 

Yukina slapped her forehead. "Idiot!" she groaned, filling in for someone else who would have whole-heartedly agreed with her.

*          *          *

Time went slowly by and Christmas drew to a close. Ryoko and the Nergal posse (including Erina) had left with promises that they would be back on New Years Eve. Darkness had fallen outside and, as the alcohol and the early morning kicked in, people began to fall asleep. Jun was snoring on the couch, Yukina and Mik had returned to their sleeping bags and Akito had taken Yurika upstairs. Only Minato and Megumi remained awake, and were using the time to clear up some of the wrapping paper, cracker toys, empty glasses and stray mince-pies that were strewn all around. Armed with large bin bags, they scouted the restaurant room, now only lit by a scattering of candles whose flames burned brilliantly in the vision against the surrounding dimness.

            Megumi scooped up a few used napkins, then the remains of a cracker before looking over at the Christmas tree in the corner and gaping in delight. 

"Oh Minato, look at that!"

            "Hmm?" Minato looked over to see what was up, chuckling in glee at what she saw. For under the shelter of the majestic tree, their two child prodigies lay, sleeping peacefully in each others arms.         

            "Oh look at them! They're so adorable," Minato breathed. 

"They sure are. It may sound ever so corny, but those two gave the best gift of all this year," Megumi mused. 

"To Erina? Or to each other?" Minato laughed.

"Both I guess," Megumi replied. "I mean, giving Erina a reason to keep living was a wonderful thing to do, but young love like theirs is so pure. And they're so right for other!"

"That's what I've been saying all along!" said Minato. "Shall I take a picture of them while they're unawares?"   

            "Oh leave them be! Let them share this intimate moment alone. And in the meantime we can get started on those dishes!"            

            "You spoilsport! I never get to have any fun!"

*          *          *

            Literal candles in gloom surrounded them, but if you took Ruri's analogy that light equalled goodness, then Hari's life was now a blazing inferno. How he had been so fortunate he did not know, but one thing was certain. For the first time in his life he had a girlfriend. And not only that, but it was the lovely Ruri Hoshino too, a girl whose beautiful appearance matched the beauty of her soul. The girl who understood him better than anyone. The girl who loved his good traits and saw past his worse ones. And a girl who he loved despite whatever flaws anyone else saw in her. She was his dream-girl and here she was, willingly in his arms and sleeping comfortably, confident that he would be there to take care of her while she did. 

He smiled down at her, brushed her fringe off her forehead and kissed her lightly there. She exhaled happily in her slumber and snuggled up closer to him. Hari squeezed her protectively and buried his face in her bountiful fair hair. This was the best. Requited love was the very finest aspect of humanity. In this embrace he could see the true potential of happiness that a human could gain. The happiness that every person strived for, and in that struggle found a reason to keep on living. From now on, it wouldn't matter how dark his days would be, so long as he had this, life would be great. And he would remember the day when he'd first found it forever.

            Yep, it had been a very fine Christmas indeed. 

**------END------**

**A/N – Merry Christmas one and all! And especially to everyone who reviewed!**


End file.
